Journey to Mei Mei

Today would have been the day...

2009-05-21T19:33:00.003-04:00

I can hardly believe it but today would have been the day for us to receive our referral if we had not joined the "special needs" process and accepted Alyson's file back in January 2007.

Michael told me recently that he would have never been able to wait this long. That makes me so sad because I think in reality we would have waited a lifetime for Alyson. It feels like we did wait a lifetime but yesterday was our familiversary, Alyson has been with us for 2 years. I can't even imagine the shell of a person I might have become if I had had to endure those two years without her. Waiting for word. Waiting for completion so we could move on with our lives. I feel so blessed and lucky that things fell into place for us when they did and we've been able to enjoy being a family of 4 for two full years now.

To all my LID mates from 3/14/06---Congratulations on finally hearing the news you've been waiting for. Congratulations on having the strength, faith, and hope to keep you going through this painful roller coaster.

And to all those with LIDs beyond 3/14/06---you are in our prayers. It's easy for us to say your blessings will come but I know how hard it is to maintain the hope, so be strong!

A picture from Gotcha day May 20, 2007:

A picture from yesterday, our 2 year familiversary:

my birthday weekend

2008-09-04T16:57:00.006-04:00

We celebrated my birthday this weekend with dinner out, a great cake, and dancing in the rain. Alyson finally fits in my Goddaughter's pink polka dot party dress that I've been dying for her to wear. She looks like she should be on the cake :-)

Back to School

2008-08-26T18:21:00.002-04:00

I swear Andrew was just a baby yesterday and now he's a 4th grader! The kids are both gowing up right before our eyes. I don't know where the summer went. Or the year for that matter!

We've been busy with a few trips, camp for Andrew, work for the grown-ups, and "school" (aka part time daycare) for Alyson.

I have grand intentions of updating the blog with pictures from the summer soon but for now here's a pic of the kids on Andrew's first day of school:

"Oh my Gosh Mama!"

2008-05-09T17:36:00.007-04:00

That's the phrase of the week around here. I have no idea when/where she picked it up but "Oh my Gosh" is apparently a very useful phrase for a multitude of situations. My favorite use was in the car one day this week. She wanted to watch Mickey Mouse in the car but we were almost home so I said no. She started to cry and whine with her usually persuasive, "Peeeeease Mama?" but I said no again so she got quiet for a second then shouted "Oh my Gosh Mama!" in a tone that really said 'you are a mean devil-woman Mama.'

Alyson keeps us either laughing or completely dumbfounded most days. She is soooooo 2! She's feisty, sassy and bossy, but oh so cute and funny! She loves to sing and dance and laugh at herself.

We've been very busy the last few months. I finally finished school in late March, the same week that we went to Las Vegas for a vacation and to visit our friends who had recently moved out there. I have pictures from that week but never bothered to put any on the blog. They're mostly of the standard Vegas sights anyway.

The kids are both in swim lessons and doing great. Alyson is much more fearless than Andrew was at this age. A little scary but probably good in the long run.

Andrew is still a superstar at school. Straight A's every quarter and has not missed a single spelling word all year! He also got 100% on the TAKS reading test (that the Texas standardized test deal that all states have). We haven't gotten his math scores back yet but we're sure those are fine too. Andrew also took his First Communion this past weekend. I took a few pictures but I won't be posting them on the blog since there are other people's kids in most of them.

I'm still working every other Friday for Alyson's pediatric cardiologist but now that school's over I've also added 1-2 night shifts a week on labor and delivery. It's great to be back at my dream job but I had forgotten, in the 9 short months I was away from it, how hard it is. Physically and mentally. It's hard to start at a new place with new doctors and new paperwork and other personalities but it's bound to get better. I do like it a lot, it's just really hard work.

Michael is working hard as usual and has been selected for Lt. Colonel. He won't pin on for several more months still but it's exciting stuff! We're very proud of him and his accomplishments! :-)

We had our one year postplacement visit with our social worker this past weekend. It's amazing the difference in Alyson since the last visit. When our social worker had come last Novemeber we were still having major issues with sleeping and lots of signs of anxious attachment. Now Alyson is well adjusted to part-time daycare, sleeps all night every night, eats well, talks a ton, isn't overly clingy, and is basically a super happy kid (with intermittent epic toddler meltdowns :-)

Well, that's the best update I can do at the moment.

Here are few pictures from the park this morning...

As you can see, she has become a much more willing model for me lately and is starting to be a ham for the camera. Her sassy personality shines through in a few of these too!

Some new pictures

2008-05-01T15:36:00.010-04:00

Here's an assortment of photos from Feb, March, and April (in reverse order...).
I'll try to carve out some time to post a proper update soon but the short version is that everyone is doing great!

These pictures totally crack me up and should give you a glimpse of Alyson's very 2 year old personality. I was trying to get a picture of her in her Easter dress and she insisted on Elmo and Cow being in the picture too. Then she had a hard time getting Elmo to cooperate apparently since she kept telling him to open his eyes and look at mama for a picture. (Note the crossed arms as she discusses his fictional lack of cooperation.)

Some bubble time with big brother...

These boots were made for sassing...

At the Austin marathon

The diva and her "glassies"

My baby turned 2 on Monday

2008-02-06T15:35:00.000-05:00

Alyson turned two. I couldn't stop her. I guess I have to let her grow but it just seems so fast. She's losing her chubby baby thighs and cheeks :-(

Of course she's still adorable but she's turning into a real little girl now. She loves to sing and dance. The Wiggles are still her favorite. She knows all the words to The Wheels on the Bus and a bunch of other songs.

-She's very curious and still says "whas dat?" a lot. She has some funny little 2 year old speech sometimes. Everything with a "v" has an "f" sound now. When she tells Bailey to move out of her way she says "moof!" She also has something against the letter "w" even though she used to use it correctly. Now it has an "h" sound. If she says her food is too hot we'll say "no, it's just warm" then she'll say "horm?" It's a nightly dinner conversation now followed by lots of giggling.

-She had a stretch of pretty bad, but pretty typical, toddler tantrums but she's been doing better the last couple weeks. Or rather my reaction to them has been less so they've been shorter.

-She's getting opinionated about her shoes now but not her clothes thank goodness so I still have control over some things.

-She peed in her new potty a few days ago but hasn't had a repeat performance. We're not pushing it though.

-Her hair is growing pretty fast and I'm getting better at fixing it. We haven't cut it at all so what looks like bangs in the pictures is just the underneath shaved layer finally growing out.

-And the best news of all is she's pretty much sleeping through the night finally. She has been for a few weeks now but I'm not lulled into a false sense of security just yet. the best part about it is that instead of crying in the morning, or at night every so often, she yells out "Mama?" It's so great to hear that instead of the sad wail. Now she knows for sure that one of us will come get her and all she has to do is call out. She goes to bed happy and wakes up happy. I still wake up every couple of hours convinced I hear her so I'm still waking up grumpy but I'm sure that will get better.

I guess that's Alyson being two in a nutshell. I have a bunch of other pictures from January that I'll post separately another day.

Love to all! :-)

The storms in China

2008-02-03T22:26:00.000-05:00

People have probably seen snippets of news about the snow in China but it's much more severe than what you might think. Many areas of the country are totally unprepared for this weather. Many of the orphanages in the southern provinces don't have heat, they've never needed it before.
Half the Sky is a wonderful organization that trains nannies and foster families for many of the orphanges and their website has updates on the conditions many of the orphanges are facing right now.
Please take a moment and read the updates and see if you can find it in your heart to make a donation to their little mouse emergency fund.

http://www.halfthesky.org/work/littlemouse.php

They are a reputable organization that we have been aware of since the beginning of our adoption journey.
Thank you :-)

Alyson's Baptism and (early) Birthday Party

2008-01-28T18:11:00.000-05:00

Alyson's Baptism was last weekend. I finally got to put her in the dress I bought for the occasion when we were in Guangzhou (China). I was afraid that we waited too long and it wasn't going to fit but it turns out it was a tad too big. She looked adorable though and she handled the Baptism really well considering she's almost 2 and didn't know what was going on.

She looks thrilled doesn't she? We're just glad she's not screaming so this is a pretty happy look afterall.

We're so glad our friends could celebrate with us!

Party Time! (The doorway streamers were a big hit!)

We decided to celebrate Alyson's birthday a little early since we had our friends here.

Mmmm. Cake.

Alyson is intently checking out one of her new Bibles.

Aww. She loves her Godmother Gen :-)

Side note: To those of you that haven't seen me in person for awhile and are wondering what's up with my crazy long hair, well, I haven't had it cut since May so now I figure I might as well grow it out long enough for Locks of Love. I need a few more inches. So yes, it kind has an 80s thing going on but I blame genetics (for the curls) and laziness and now a purpose (for the amount :-).

Just an update and December pictures

2008-01-10T14:18:00.000-05:00

I really need to post more often. I'm afraid I'm going to start forgetting some of the cute things the kids say and do. They're both growing and changing so fast I can hardly keep up.

Christmas just whizzed by in a blur but was very low stress and fun. The low-stress part is pretty unusual for me so it was nice. The kids were properly spoiled.

We had a nice New Year's Eve with our friends over and Michael's Dad and Stepmom. Everyone except Alyson stayed up just past midnight. When I put Andrew to bed he said, "2007 was a good year! We got Alyson and a Wii!" I'm just glad he ranked Alyson first. Then again, he may have just been thinking chronologically. We did get Alyson first. The Wii came from Santa and boy is it fun! (Don't worry, I do let Andrew play with it sometimes ;-)

Alyson is talking up a storm. She says lots of recognizable sentences and some not so recognizable ones. She's really into taking inventory of everyone's whereabouts. Several times a day she says, "Where Daddy at? Where Andrew? Where Bailey?" Sometimes she'll wait for me to answer sometimes she'll just answer herself with Daddy work, Andrew school, Bailey home, Bailey sleeping. Yes, the dog sleeps a lot. She also thinks it's funny to say "Where Alyson? or Where Mama?" Even though we're right there. She likes to point to herself and say Alyson with a big grin, it's so cute how she pronounces it. I'll have to get it on video one day soon.

Alyson has been quite sick this past week with croup, and ear infection and some other respiratory combo that's not croup related. We went to the ER 3 times in 4 days because she just looked terrible and was working so hard to breathe. I'm not convinced that she doesn't have pneumonia but she didn't have it on Sunday when they did her chest x-ray during the 2nd ER visit so we'll just keep watching her and see how it goes. She's definitely better today, a lot less coughing but she still has a fever. Hopefully she's on the mend though.

Other than this episode and the RSV in October (I think), she's very healthy. I don't think I ever posted about her last cardiology appointment in September but the echo went great (thanks to a lollipop) and her doctor says the repair looks really good. He doesn't need to see her for another year! :-) At that visit he also offered me a job which has turned out to be just awesome. I only work 2 days a month and do all the EKGs and vitals on the kids. The doctors in the practice take turns coming to San Angelo from San Antonio to do clinic days twice a month. They used to always bring a nurse with them but now I do it so it's a win win situation for everyone.

I think that's all the updating I can do. Alyson is going to wake from her nap any minute now.

Here are some pictures from Andrew's birthday and Christmas. Enjoy!

Hmm. Whose pudgy little finger might that be?

The 2 best Christmas presents ever, sitting under the tree.

New hat from Aunt Julia, so cute!

Couldn't even wait to take the packaging off. She was ready to draw!

Pictures from November

2007-12-29T17:49:00.001-05:00

some more catching up. Pictures from November...

More pecans

Just playing in the yard

Playing at the park

Thanksgiving at Grandpa Bob and Nana's

Having some whipped cream with Aunt Lauri
Decorating our tree

pictures from October

2007-12-14T14:53:00.000-05:00

I'm behind, big surprise. Just thought I'd try to catch up with some pictures of the kids from October then I'll do another post with pictures from November.

We have one lone pecan tree in our front yard. Alyson loves to go out there and try to pick them.

I love this picture. I swear she's not as serious as she appears in all her pictures, she just really doesn't like having her picture taken.

6 Month Familiversary

2007-11-20T18:22:00.000-05:00

Six months ago today we became a complete family. Alyson was brought to us in that odd little Civil Affairs office in Kunming, China six months ago today. Wow.

She has changed and grown so much.

This was her referral picture from when she was 7 months old.

These pictures are from Gotcha day. May 20, 2007

And this is from a few days ago...

So, in true frugal Hulin family fashion we're taking our priceless kids to IHOP for dinner! (Kids eat free on Tuesdays :-) How's that for a family celebration?! We'll do it up bigger for the 1 year anniversary :-)

Happy Halloween from Tinkerbell and The Pirate! Arrrgh!

2007-11-01T08:47:00.000-04:00

You know you're in Texas when you can trick or treat in shorts!
Apparently Tinkerbell wields a sword these days. No wand for this pixie! She was even saying Arrgh! Andrew eventually got his sword back :-)

Alyson was pretty taken with this cat that went to the door with them.

We interrupt this blog to provide a public service announcement to the socially inept

2007-10-29T17:21:00.000-04:00

I need to vent a little

For my real friends and family, this is not directed at you. If you say something hurtful or unintentionally stupid, I’ll tell you. I’m not afraid to educate you in person :-). This is for the general population that just doesn’t get it. To be fair, I’m sure the majority of the general public doesn’t intend to be stupid or hurtful either but I thought maybe I could educate them a little for future encounters with adoptive families.

Alyson and I were at a birthday party not too long ago where we met the husband of a friend of mine (a pretty new friend, hence my inability to “educate” them). So here’s how the conversation went:

Him: So Jana tells me you adopted your little girl from China?
Me: yes, we did (big proud smile)
Him: We thought about doing that once.
Me: (silence while I fiddle with Alyson’s ponytail so I can pretend I didn’t hear him.)
But on the inside I’m saying: No you didn’t. You might have thought of dyeing your hair once. You might have thought of taking up figure skating once but you don’t think about adopting “once.”

He continues: I always thought that would be neat.
Me: (nod and smile) But on the inside: No, bungee jumping would be neat. Taking an Alaskan cruise would be neat. Committing your life to raising a child, especially one that has suffered multiple losses in her first 15 months of life, is not “neat.” It’s amazing, rewarding, and glorious but it’s not “neat.”

Him: Is she your first?
Me: No, we have an 8 year old son (another big proud grin)
Him: Is he adopted?
Me: No.
But on the inside: Did I ask you how your children were conceived or brought into your family? Just because I have an obviously adopted child, what gives you the right to ask about my other child? If Andrew and I were out somewhere without Alyson, no one in their right mind would think it’s ok to ask if he was adopted or not. How is that fair to him, to suddenly question his background just because he has a sister from China? Seriously. What if he is adopted but we haven’t told him yet? Do you think it’s ok for a stranger to start that conversation for us?
(Ok, that’s pretty extreme seeing as how he’s almost 9 years old. That would be pretty irresponsible of us to have not told him yet but that’s beside the point. And no, he’s NOT adopted.)

Now I know this gentleman was asking totally innocent questions out of genuine curiosity but it got under my skin anyway.

On to a different vent…
I can’t stand it when people say “We always said that if we couldn’t have children of our own, we would adopt.”
Sigh.
I’m not going to deny that it’s totally natural to try for an old fashioned conception/pregnancy first when starting a family. It’s easier, it’s cheaper, and it’s more fun (well, the first 100 or so tries anyway).

That’s fine to feel that adoption is a second choice after pregnancy. Just don’t ever say that in front of my daughter.

One of these days she’s going to understand those words and I don’t EVER want her to feel like the way she was brought into our family was a last resort. Alyson was a choice we pursued with all our hearts. She is a miracle that we prayed for as fervently as we did for Andrew. And she is a gift, not a last resort.

Another thing wrong with “We always said that if we couldn’t have children of our own, we would adopt,” is when people say it like they want to make us feel better. It’s as if they’re saying “we would have done the same thing if we were in that situation.” Like it somehow validates our choice. We don’t need you to validate our choice. We’re thrilled with our choice. We weren’t in a ‘situation.’ We were at a fork in the road and we, along with God’s guidance, chose our path. (Little did we know at the time that our ‘path’ was an ice covered mountain pass with dangerous twists and turns every 2 miles along the 400 mile stretch, but I digress…)

Ok, last vent. Along the lines of the “last resort” sentiment. It’s when people who are trying to get pregnant say “well, if it doesn’t work out, we can always adopt.”
Umm, hate to break it to you…no you can’t. Well, maybe you can but it’s not as simple as you think.
We can’t adopt from China again. We no longer qualify under their new rules. Who am I kidding, we can’t adopt from practically anywhere ever again. We can’t afford it. Good news is, we’re done. Our family is complete, so we don’t need to worry about it.
Just a caution that just because we made adoption look easy, doesn’t mean anyone can do it.

I’m sure the people who know us well are saying, “is she insane? She didn’t make adoption look easy. She complained constantly.” And they’re right. It’s just easy for people to forget the process when they see Alyson’s beautiful face so they say stupid things like “we could always adopt if we have to.”
It’s like labor. They say you’ll forget the pain, otherwise no one would do it more than once. They’re right, it’s been almost 9 years and the memory of the pain of delivering Andrew has faded some. I’m sure someday the pain and stress of the icy mountain path to Alyson will fade too.

I’m done. We will now get back to our regularly scheduled cheerful blogging…

RSV, croup, and "uh oh, whas dat?"

2007-10-28T15:45:00.000-04:00

As if our poor kid hasn't had enough night troubles, now she's had RSV and croup for the last week. It's been rough but she started feeling better yesterday and she slept pretty well last night. She seems less frightened at night too so hpefully we're turning a corner both in her health and her anxiety issues. That sounds so bad, "anxiety issues." I dont' know what else to call it. She's just having a normal adopted toddler rough time. She has some more grieving to do and it can take kids years to truly trust their new family. We'll get through it :-)

Good news is none of this has slowed her down from learning new words and phrases in the past few weeks.
Some of our favorites:

uh oh, whas dat?
uh oh, whas dat clue? (while watching blue's clues)
where's daddy at?
stinky
ewwww
cute
neat
pretty
thank you (although she seems to have given up on please)
bless you (sounds like tissue, she says it after anyone sneezes)
good girl (referring to herself sometimes but usually the dog)

On to some pictures... They're a little out of order but essentially newer to older.

This is the expression we call "horror movie." I'm not even sure how it started now but whenever we say "horror movie," she'll make this face like she's bracing herself for something startling. It's hilarious.

This picture is too dark but she's just so cute.
Helping Daddy sweep acorns off the walk.

These pictures were taken when I was trying to put Alyson's new stroller together. Andrew laid down on the floor to watch me so of course little sis has to do everything he does...

Andrew surfing on a turtle at the nature center. Alyson didn't want anything to do with this turtle.

Alyson lecturing her brother about something or other...

Pretty sunset on the lake that the nature center is on.

A rough couple weeks

2007-10-14T21:14:00.000-04:00

Sorry for not posting in ages. It's been a hard and busy month. Michael and I each had a Grandmother pass away this month. We're both sad but we have many happy memories of the long, full lives they had. On a positive note, Alsyon did great with the travel to California and all the activity surrounding my Grandma's funeral. It was nice for the rest of the family to meet her and she handled everything really well.

She had her first babysitter on September 29th and survived that as well. We had a high school girl that lives only a couple blocks away come for the evening so we could go to the Air Force Ball. She came over the weekend before just to visit and get Alyson used to her. It went really well, hardly any cying and she let the babysitter put her to bed without trouble.

Then the very next week I started her in a Mother's Day Out program on Tuesdays and Thrusday mornings for just a couple hours because I'm having such a hard time getting my schoolwork done and we want to ease her into the idea of other caregivers before she starts a 3 day a week day care when I go back to work sometime in the spring. We started out slow and built up to a couple hours.

Well, things haven't been right since. Alyson has only slept through the night once since we started the program and she has become a velcro child. Things had been going great in the attachment and bonding department but we must have tried too much too soon and she's getting insecure again. She cries at the drop of a pin and she won't let me out of her sight without a complete meltdown. I feel terrible about it. We decided to keep trying short periods of time at the program in hopes that she's just suffering from average toddler seraration anxiety.

Things have gotten much better as of today. She only cried for a minute when I left her and she came to me with open arms and a smile when I picked her up, then she started to cry when she remembered that she was mad at me for leaving ;-) That was a vast improvement over the first couple times when she didn't cry or reach out and wouldn't make eye contact with me.

I took her to the doctor yesterday convinced that she had an ear infection or something to account for the waking 3 times a night crying and general discontent but there's not a thing physically wrong with her. It's all emotional. It's hard to remember that she's only been with us for less than 5 months. It feels like she has been a part of us forever. She still has a lot of grieving and adjusting to do.

Since today went so well, we're going to keep trying the mom's day out program. I think stopping and starting again later could be even worse at this point. I think if we're consistent with our routine and continuing doing all the things that are recommended for forming secure attachments, things will get better. This afternoon has been so much better already, hence my ability to post this at all. She's playing with Michael and Andrew right now and not flipping out about the fact that I'm in another room. This is such a relief!

So it's all a work in progress and we'll take it day by day :-)

On to some pictures...

I'm having some issues uploading pictures to blogger so here's a few for now, I'll have to do the rest separately. They'll be out of order but oh well :-)

These are from Michael's end of the year squadron picnic. I'm guessing this was Alyson's first time in a bounce house. Very fun! Then Andrew got to go for a boat ride in Michael's coworker's boat. (Guess who wants to buy a boat now?)

Future surfer?

All that bouncing is very tiring...

I'll post some other pictures soon...

A bunch of pictures

2007-09-09T10:27:00.000-04:00

I'm still playing with my new camera. :-)

Alyson gives Bailey lots of "love."

Chatting on the phone is still her favorite thing to do.

Shocking gossip, I'm sure.

Sugar and Spice?

Innocent?

Hmm, maybe not...

OK, here's a little sugar :-)

Giving Andrew a little help on the swing

Our beautiful kids

My blue eyed boy is growing up so fast :-(

He's growing up, but he's still very "8" :-)

I'm playing with the fast action mode on my camera-trying to make Andrew look like he's swinging at the speed of light...

Just another cutie patootie slightly frowny face shot

What?! There's no catering for this photo shoot? This is an outrage, people! I'm outta here!!!...

Happy Birthday to me!

2007-09-06T20:10:00.000-04:00

My birthday was this past weekend and I got a new camera that is awesome! I took a bunch of pictures of Alyson at the park this morning. I'm learning all the fancy settings and playing around a lot with the new camera but I'm pretty happy with these:

(be sure to click on them to make them bigger :-)

Alyson's room

2007-08-31T14:15:00.001-04:00

We finally have Alyson's new room in the new house properly organized and decorated. Here's some pictures:

The view from the doorway:

The big rocking chair is blue so that's why it's covered with blankets :-)

This dresser will go down in history as the piece of furniture that made us vow to never buy "assembly required" furniture ever again.The cutest rocking chair ever from http://www.toddlerock.com/

We bought the fan while in China and it matches her decor perfectly. The "a" on the door is a decorated magnetic board that was made by a friend of my sister.
We weren't going to get a changing table but I was sick of changing her on the floor so I got this one at a second hand store. It doesn't really match the other furniture but it's a temporary thing anyway.

Some pictures

2007-08-26T22:41:00.000-04:00

Alyson and Andrew are doing great. Andrew starts 3rd grade tomorrow. Yikes! Where has the time gone?! We've had a busy month, as usual. We've spent a lot of time at the pool and the park so I have a bunch of pictures. Alyson's hair is finally growing so I've been able to do some pigtails. She's so cute :-) Michael says the pigtails look like bug antennae. Well she is our cute little bug so I don't care. He's just a guy, he doesn't get a vote ;-)

On a health note, Alyson had some bloodwork done and a TB test last week and all looks good except that she's slightly anemic. That could be due to prior poor nutrition or she's still not completely recovered from the blood loss during her open heart surgery. Either way, it should improve with time and vitamins.

We'll see her new pediatric cardiologist later in September and he'll try to do another echo then. If she does as poorly with this one as she did the last then we'll schedule a sedated one. She's doing a little better with doctors now though so hopefully we'll be able to avoid sedation. She let the regular pediatrician actually put his stethescope on her without screaming a couple weeks ago. He said he hears a murmur still so that's a tiny bit concerning but we'll know what's up for sure with the next echo.

She's doing awesome though. Talking up a storm. We can tell that her babbling has taken on more English intonnations now. I think she's losing what little Mandarin she did have. It makes me sad but there's not a lot we can do about it at the moment.

She's quite the bossy little thing, like most 18 month olds I suppose. Andrew and the dog bear the brunt of most of her bossyness but they both take it well. She loves to tell Bailey to "moooooove." For awhile we thought she was mooing at the dog but then we figured out she was telling her to move out of her way. Very cute. When Bailey does what Alyson wants, which is rarely, she tells her "good girl." It's so funny, it's like she wants to parent soemthing too.

On to what everyone's here for really, the pictures :-)

Catching up, finally

2007-07-30T07:49:00.000-04:00

It's been a busy month, that's for sure! We moved into our new home in Texas and we're getting settled. As all parents know, everything takes at least 10 times longer to accomplish with a toddler in tow so the unpacking and general catching up is kind of slow going. We're getting there though :-)

Alyson and Andrew did great on the long drive from Ohio to Texas. Between the days in Ohio when our house was getting packed and time on the road and time on the Texas end waiting for our stuff we ended up spending 8 nights in 5 different hotels. Alyson did great sleeping in the Pack n Play and putting up with all the changes. We'd only been our new house for 4 days before Michael had to go out of town for 2 weeks so that stressed her out a bit and she started waking several times a night again. She's back on track now-thank goodness! Sleep deprivation, a brand new town, no friends, a house in chaos, and a husband out of town is NOT a good recipie for a cheerful mom. Luckily my oldest sister and her kids came for a visit to break it up. It was so nice for Andrew to spend some time with his cousins and for them to meet Alyson.

Last week Michael took command of his new squadron so we had tons of extended family in town for the ceremony. It was a busy but great week. Everyone fell in love with Alyson. She did really well with all the attention and warmed up to everyone quickly.

She's really adjusting perfectly and is very attached to us even though she was willing to be held by other family members.

She's talking quite a bit, most of it we don't understand. A lot of it still sounds like Mandarin baby talk. She loves to talk. She'll turn anything into a "phone" that she can hold up to her ear and babble away-calculator, remote, my Dymo labeler, tupperware lids, she's not picky. She copies me everytime I'm on the phone or when I'm ordering food at a drive thru. That one's particularly annoying-cute but annoying. Usually the poor fast food people can't hear a word I'm saying with little miss yelling from the back seat. Andrew thinks it's hilarious and laughs and laughs which just encourages her more. I'm trying to catch some of this non-stop chatter on video so I can post a clip. Just the other day she was holding up a toy cell phone to one ear and putting her finger in her other ear while she was babbling. Hmm, wonder where she learned that move.

She does have quite a few English words/phrases too. The ones I can think of at the moment are:

no, no, no

stop

stop it

stop that

you stop

(noticing a trend yet? No question that she's almost 18 months old)

up (although how she makes that word 3 syllables long is beyond me)

dog

dog-dog

down

Bailey (the dog)

Andrew (much clearer now-it used to sound like she was saying Avery)

Daddy

Mama (sounds kind of like mom-mom)

chip (as in potato or tortilla chip)

all done

night night (this one's very cute, she says it with a big grin when she sees one of us making her a bottle)

Those are the ones I can think of at the moment.

She's completely off the formula now but we're still giving her her milk in a bottle 3 times a day for now. She's doing great with sippy cups or cups with straws for water throughout the day. She's feeding herself with a spoon really well. She must have been doing that before we got her because she's really adept at it. She is getting a lot more picky about food. Her favorite right now is mashed potatoes with rice being a close second.

I think that's the best I can update for the moment. Here's a bunch of pictures that are totally out of order but at least they're posted:

This was the cake our friend made for our block party in Ohio before we moved.

A pretty common sight. Alyson pushing Andrew out of her way. He takes it really well though.

This is the "I'm about to cry" look. She was mad because I wouldn't give her my camera. Boy does she hate to be told "no."

This is a pink foam cowgirl hat I put on her head while we were shopping in Hobby Lobby.

A beautician in the making. She's fascinated by her nail clippers. These are my sister's hands and feet she's "working" on.

Natasha, this one's for you. Remember when I was talking to you on the phone while in the WalMart parking lot and you couldn't hear what I was saying over Alyson's chatter? Well this is what she was doing.

It's Alyson's mission in life to get Andrew's DS away from him.

What? Doesn't everyone eat their broccoli stem first?

Well, that was easy so here's some more

2007-06-14T20:45:00.000-04:00

She giggles on this one.

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another Frankenstein walk (with a big smile)

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video

2007-06-14T19:57:00.000-04:00

This is my first attempt to upload a video. If it works, I have a few more to post.

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Echo and brotherisms

2007-06-14T09:10:00.000-04:00

Alyson had her echo on Tuesday. She was hysterical during it but the cardiologist persevered and got as much info as he could. She will need another echo under sedation but since we are moving to our new base in a couple weeks he said it could wait a few months. He said that from what he could see the repair looks good and there are no signs of pulmonary hypertension. That's the best news! There are also no signs of any other defects. In 2 of 3 views the VSD repair looked complete with no leaking but he said that in one view it appeared there might be a little flow across the patch. It was hard to tell though with her screaming and fighting. Even if there was a tiny leak it might close on it's own as the scar tissue and heart muscle fills in. Her left ventricle is still slightly enlarged but that's very normal. So all in all great news!

On to the brotherisms. Andrew is an awesome big brother. This new role is bringing out parts of his personality that I hadn't seen before. He is very patient with her and tells her he loves her several times a day. It is so sweet to see this relationship develop. As sweet as it is, Andrew is still an 8 year old boy and 8 year old boys say and do such funny things. The other day when Alyson had a poopy diaper, Andrew announced that if I didn't change it soon he was going to DIE. Right, the dramatic death by baby-sister-stinky-pants that we hear so much about. Then when I still didn't move quick enough for him he said "can we PLEASE go to the grocery store and buy a gas mask?" Our Kroger is pretty well stocked but I don't think I've ever seen gas masks there.

As responsible as Andrew is, it's still a little risky having him "watch" (i.e. distract) Alyson while I try to do things like take the world's fastest shower. When I came out of the shower the other day I found him playing "bowling for babies" with Alyson. She was sitting on the floor in our bedroom and he was rolling a large beach ball at her to see if he could knock her over. Great game huh?
Some things I learned from this:
-showering daily is so overrated at this stage of the game.
-"Daddy taught me the game." Hmm.
-8 year olds frequently appear brighter than they really are.
-Alyson worships her brother and will do anything he does and says. Uh oh.

Good news is no one got hurt and Alyson thought is was very fun so no one call the social worker, I've learned my lesson :-)

In other news, Alyson is eating well again. She kind of went on strike for a couple days but on Monday I got a recipe on the internet and made a big pot of congee. She loved it! We're trying to stick to our routine as much as possible and I can tell that helps. She's been napping well and sleeping through the night with the exception of the night before last when she woke at 2:30 and 4:30. I don't know what that was all about but I got her back to sleep pretty quickly.

She's walking independently a lot more. It's still a bit of the Frankenstein walk with outstretched arms and a little wobbly but she getting more secure. She also crawled away from me the other day and was so excited to see me still there when she crawled back. This is big in attachment land. She's feeling more secure and is not as afraid to be a few feet away from me. Making dinner is so much easier now. Up until a couple days ago she would scream and cry if I tried to go into the kitchen without her. It's only 10 feet away from the living room and there are no walls, she could see me. Now she'll sit and play with Andrew happily while I'm in the kitchen. I've also resorted to using The Wiggles to help babysit. We've been home less than 2 weeks and I'm already relying on TV. Sad, but with my husband out of town I gotta do what I gotta do to get the little buggers fed :-)

I think that's it for now. I have some more pictures to post later and I'm trying to get a video clip of her walking.

some pictures from our first week home

2007-06-10T21:29:00.000-04:00

Seeing her room and toys for the first time last Saturday night.

Jet lag is tough. This was on Monday. She crashed on the couch with Daddy.

Happy girl at dinnertime. She's not really feeding herself but she tries.

A different night. First time with Spaghetti but she's all about those noodles!

Role model?

My brother is funny :-)

We can be friends, but don't get too close to my blankie!

Who can resist these little feet?

Trying for a decent picture of the 2 of them again.

Funny face.

First trip to the playground today. She liked the swing.

Ok. This is our sweet Baliey. She's resting her head on my leg intently watching Alyson with her snack and hoping she'll drop some.

Now Alyson's getting bold and is actually taunting her. Bailey is being soooo good and patient.

Even bolder taunting but Bailey's completely fixated on the cup of gerber puffs.

Hey look Bailey, I can retrieve stuff too!

She slept through the night. Hallelujah!

2007-06-09T14:08:00.000-04:00

I know we've only been home 7 nights and it can take weeks to get sleeping straightened out but knowing that hasn't made us less tired so we're so thankful that Alyson slept all night last night :-)
Well technically she woke at 2:30 with a bit of a cry/whimper but before my feet even hit the floor to go get her she had soothed herself. Our first few nights home when she woke up one of us would go get her and sleep with her in the big bed in her room. Then the night before last Michael was able to leave her in her crib but sit next to it and rub her head until she fell back to sleep. Maybe that helped her put herself back to sleep last night.
Alyson had her first peds appointment, immunizations and a chest x-ray this week. The peds appointment went pretty well, she has a very nice Nurse Practitioner for her primary care manager. We decided to start all her immunizations over again even though we got somewhat of a shot record from China so she got 6 shots and that went about as well as one could expect. The real nightmare was the chest x-ray. She screamed and trembled like I've never seen before. She was clearly traumatized by the room. She kept looking around and screaming as if she was looking for a way out. When she couldn't find one, she shut her eyes and started twitching. I thought she was going to have a seizure or pass out. I picked her up off the table and told the tech to open the door. I just had a feeling she needed to see the way out. As soon as he opened the door she started to melt in my arms and relax, still screaming but her body relaxed. I told them I couldn't put her through anymore so we'd have to skip the rest of the x-rays for now and I walked her out. She was almost immediately better when we got in the hallway, I hadn't even stopped to get her clothes back on, I just wanted to get her out of there.
That was rough but she recovered quickly. I on the other hand cried for 20 minutes then was frustrated and angry for hours. Clearly the x-ray techs at the base don't work with children very often and have no clue that when a mom and child have a fragile bond, the mom shouldn't be the one to restrain the child for a procedure. I should have been there to comfort her but a tech should have been the one holding her arms up.
We survived that and have our next challenge next week, her first cardiology appointment, an echo, and an ekg. That should be fun for all ;-)

I have more updates and pictures for this post but Little A just woke from her nap so I gotta go! I'll try again tonight after she goes to bed.

We're home!

2007-06-03T10:25:00.000-04:00

The travel was a little brutal but we made it and we are settling in at home. Alyson is, as expected, a little off in the sleep department. We got home last night around 10PM and she got to bed around 11:30 then was up at 5:30. No suprise when she had a major meltdown around 9AM so back to bed she went :-) We'll get back on track in another day or two I'm sure. It is so nice to be home and have clean running water, our own washer and dryer, our own beds...etc. etc.
It was so awesome to introduce Alyson to the house and her very own room and toys. She had no trouble going to sleep in her new room by herself. We talked to her from our bedroom for a bit so she'd know we were still in the house. We were prepared to have her sleep with us or for one of us to sleep in her room but she was fine on her own. Hopefully we're on the path to a good routine for all :-)
Once Andrew was in bed and Alyson was sleeping in her crib I just stood in the hallway in awe of the fact that we had 2 children in our home. We've been through so much to get to this point, it was overwhelming to stand there in the hall and be able to see both my sleeping children and know that we've made it. It's done, our family is complete and we get to start really living now.

I really feel for all the families that are still waiting for their blessings to come. One day soon you too will be able to stand outside your baby's room and realize that every moment of stress from the last 2 years (or maybe 10 years) was worth it.

We're heading home.

2007-06-01T01:38:00.000-04:00

We're packing up and heading home. You won't hear from us for a few days probably but I'll try to post a quick hello once we're home so everyone knows we made it safely.

A couple more pictures before we go...

This morning we began the eternal quest for a photo where both kids look good. Now I know why my sister can never get a good family Christmas picture. It's much harder with 2 kids! Worth every second of trying though :-)

Hey, there's fish down there!

I don't have time for pictures, I want to be with the fish...

Don't they look cool in their Chinese duds?

Farewell China!

Look out USA, here comes your newest immigrant soon to be citizen!! :-)

Scary food, Buddhist Temple and Visa day

2007-05-30T09:01:00.001-04:00

Today we got Alyson's Visa so everything is official and she will become a citizen when we land in LA. Technically once we had over our documents to the LA immigration officer I think. Our appointment at the US Consulate was a little nuts. Lots of shuffling around, some instructions from an official then we all stood and said our oath proclaiming that our paperwork was accurate. Then everyone clapped and said congratulations. That was it. It's all done. Alyson's stuck with us now :-) On the bus ride back she was yelling at the window at passing cars and we were joking that she was probably begging for help and saying this is all some kind of mistake, get me off this bus and find me a different family. But it's too late now. We're forever!! :-)
She says a lot of stuff in Mandarin but some is just baby talk and some is unidentifiable anyway. A shop keeper translated for us last night that Alyson said "go home." Meaning she was tired of shopping. Uh oh. That doesn't bode well for my daughter to tire of shopping!
Oh, at the consulate there were Reuter's reporters taping our group (40 families?) doing the oath etc so maybe a clip will show up on CNN or something.

Here's a bunch of pictures from last night and today except for the Consulate stuff. They don't allow cameras. Well, unless you're Reuters I guess.

Last night we went back to the restaurant with all the creatures out front. I had rice again. Big suprise. This time I took a few pictures of some of the creatures you could choose from.

Cute girl dressed in her red white and blue since it's her Visa day.

We've had many hot bus rides in the last couple weeks.

Today we went to the Six Banyan Trees Buddhist Temple. The Monks did a blessing for the babies. It was very nice in theory but I had no idea what they were saying and it was like 200 degrees inside the temple. It's hard to embrace the moment when sweat is dripping off your forehead.

Michael and Andrew climbed the 14 or 17 stories inside the Pagoda. Alyson and I waited in the shade, not that it mattered, it's still stifiling in the shade.

Incense.

I wish this picture wasn't blurry. At the base of the Buddha, there are stacked cans of orange soda. It was the funniest thing. Maybe Buddha likes Sunkist? I can't imagine why else it's on the altar. It was in a few different places too.

On the bus ride back to the hotel from the Temple. Awww.

After our hot trip to the temple we went to our hotel pool. Alyson seemed to like it at first then she had a total meltdown. We're not sure if she really hated the water or if she was just tired an hungry.

This is the daytime view from our hotel room on the 27th floor.

I guess that's it for tonight :-)

Red couch, visa medical exam, more pearl shopping

2007-05-28T22:11:00.000-04:00

View of the pearl river from our hotel at night
The famous red couch picture. I don't know who started this tradition but it's pretty funny trying to herd all the kids in our group onto the couch then expect them to all smile at the same time.

The Kunming girls, Alyson and Natalie.

Our Holt group.

The medical exam office for required check up before Visa issuance.

Not a happy camper.

This is just funny that there is a sauna centre since the whole city is a sauna. It is so hot and humid here, I can't even describe it. It's miserable.

Shopping for more pearls in the Guangzhou pearl market. Gen, these people are stringing yours, Michelle's and Josie's pearls.

Andrew at breakfast this morning.

The waterfall at our hotel.

Cute kid

We're in Guangzhou

2007-05-27T08:30:00.000-04:00

We made it Guangzhou yesterday and are settled in our room at the White Swan. Yesterday was some kind of parenting test. Our flight from Kunming to Guangzhou was scheduled for 10:40. We left the hotel around 8:40. When we got to the airport with our travel mates and our guide we discovered that the babies had the wrong tickets. Our guide had to call our travel agency then run over to some other counter and fix the tickets. That got taken care of and then we discover that our travel agency never actually paid for Andrea and John's tickets so our guide tells us to stay at the check in counter and she goes, with all of our passports, to some other ticket counter and tries to get that straightened out. She comes back and says our family can check our bags but Andrea and John's situation still wasn't resolved. They told us to go ahead but we didn't want to leave them. About 9:50 and several phone calls later they get their tickets. We rush through security and guess who's the dumb *&^ that put scissors in her carry on? Yeah, that would be me. Now remember, I'm now on day 5 of a fever and probably bronchitis so I'm not all that sharp. In our packing frenzy the night before I did some rearranging and didn't realize I put them in the carryon. The good news is I'm not writing this from a Chinese prison. Actually it turned out to be not a big deal, they just confiscated them and let us go on our way.
We made the flight no problem. But it gets better.

It's supposed to be a 1 1/2 hour flight. After 2 hours they state that due to bad weather in Guangzhou they are going to divert and land in Shenshen. Um, ok. Where's Shenshen and what about the guide that's meeting us in Guangzhou? We're resourceful people, we've traveled a fair amount but the idea of landing somewhere unscheduled where we're lucky if there's any signage in English is a little worrisome. So we land in Shenshen but don't deplane. We just sit on the tarmac in the cargo area for over 2 hours. People are getting up and milling about, then without warning the plan starts backing up. None of that silly American type nonesense like take your seat and buckle up. No, we just start taxing then they say take a seat we're going to try for Guangzhou again.

So we make it Guangzhou around 4PM I think and our guide is nowhere to be found. We haven't eaten since breakfast other than some snacks, the babies are tired and cranky and I still feel like I've been run over by a semi. All our luggage made it though so we're thankful for small favors. I have the name and address of our hotel written in Chinese so we're not too worried. We figure we can get a cab or shuttle if need be but Holt always stresses that if your guide isn't there to meet you, you should call the contact and don't leave the airport. John makes the call and finds out that the guide is in the airport but has no idea our flight landed in Guangzhou. The screens all still say the flight was "alternated" so she thinks were in Shenshen.
After a little while we find her and our driver and we get to the hotel in one piece. We had dinner then crashed.
(Just a side note, I'm not a pilot or a meteorologist but the weather didn't seem that bad to me. We're pretty sure an American pilot would have been able to land in the first place. It was just a huge rainstorm.)

Today has been a better day. I still had a low fever this morning but right now, 9 PM, I'm feeling pretty good. I did have a couple Chinese beers with dinner so that may be helping :-)
We've met up with the rest of our Holt group that were all in different provinces for the past week and we got to meet all the kids and exchange stories. We had dinner at a place that has tanks full of creatures out front that you can choose from for your meal. Very interesting. I had rice again. If the scale in our hotel bathroom is accurate then I've lost about 10 pounds so far on this adventure. Being sick is part of that I'm sure as well as having to take turns with Michael to eat since one has to entertain and feed the Princess too :-) I forgot what it's like dining with a toddler. She is really doing great though. She also handled that flight and the delays really well. Being stuck on the plane like that could have been a real nightmare but it was ok, we survived.

I can't wait to really feel better so I can enjoy Guangzhou. There are all kinds of great shops to explore. Tomorrow we are going to the Jade and Pearl market so we can further hone our bartering skills and get more souveniers. I think tomorrow may be Alyson's Visa medical exam too. I don't have the schedule in front of me so I'm not sure.

Just a note for those waiting to travel to China, upgrading to the Jr suite at the White Swan is worth every penny. It is so nice to have some space. I was getting really claustrophobic in the Kunming hotel. (The beds are still like sleeping on concrete though.)

Here's few pictures from yesterday. They're out of order but I don't have the energy to fix them. Alyson has so many funny facial expressions, there's pictures of a few of them at the end.

Here's she's reading the yellow pages. We need to get her home to her proper book collection!
I know we're in China but it's still weird to see everything written in Chinese.

Done with the yellow pages, getting the newspaper out.

Hmm. Done with the paper. I'll just stash it in this cubby. She likes to hide stuff.

sleepy girl.

First plane ride.

last day in Kunming

2007-05-25T08:04:00.000-04:00

We got Alyson's passport on time this evening so we will be leaving for Guangzhou as planned tomorrow morning. We also received 3 notarized copies of her Chinese birth certificate and certificate of abandonment.
I'm still fighting some sort of chest cold and fever so I started the antibiotics I brought and hope to feel better in the morning. We skipped today's sightseeing since I have no energy and it was raining anyway.
Alyson is doing great. She's giggling a lot and is very vocal. Her foster parents must have played telephone with her because she keeps picking up the remote and chattering into it. She coughed quite a bit last night but generally she's sleeping great. She's eating great too. There's not much she won't eat.

We're really tired and have to get up early to head to Guangzhou so I'll have to save today's pictures for another time. We should have no problem getting internet and email in Guangzhou but you never know so don't worry about us if you don't hear from us for a day or 2.

Love to all!

orphanage visit

2007-05-24T08:26:00.000-04:00

We're all doing well. Alyson is a spitfire girl. We love her to death. She fits right in with the family. She's very much a toddler. She's a mess at meals and dressing her is just like stuffing an octopus in a sack. She's a wiggle worm and she thinks it's so funny to squirm away when we're trying to change her. It brings back a lot of memories, and a lot of back pain! :-)

We visited the Kunming orphanage today. Alyson probably only spent a few months there then went into foster care but a few of the caretakers recognized her and called her by name. She reached out for one of the ladies so she must remember her.

According to the orphange representative that took us on our tour, they are in charge of caring for 600 children. 500 of those are in foster care and about 300 of the children have CP. I'm pretty sure that's what she said but I may be mistaken on the number. We saw a group of children with CP and I got the impression they use CP as a blanket term for many disabilities.

We also saw a room with 8-10 special needs babies. They all looked healthy and just had needs like club feet or cleft lip. There were 6 nannies in that room. There was also one Albino baby sleeping in the arms of a caregiver.

We started our tour in an administrative welcoming room where we were served really good green tea. Alyson wanted to walk all over the place while we were there. She's still not steady enough to go without holding a hand but she is fast!

Do you see the mischevious grin? That's hot tea in those cans. She's a magnet for danger. Uh Oh.

One of the classrooms had some English stuff on the chalkboard.

Ready to get back on the bus.

Our hotel has a panorama lounge on top. This is the view of Green lake park from up there.

This is what looks like a poor group of apartments in the city.

In the Green Lake park

Our kiddos.

Shopping. Andrew was looking bored so the shop keeper brought out a little stool for him to sit on while Michael and I bargained for embroidery pieces.

I'll leave you tonight with this sweet little face.

Kunming day 4

2007-05-23T08:41:00.001-04:00

Here's a bunch of pictures from the last 2 days. The first is the one I've been dying to capture--Happy Girl!!

In the Kunming Walmart. Right after I took this picture a man came up to us and said "no pictures." I Don't know why we couldn't take pictures but I'm just glad he didn't take my camera away.

Cruising along the furniture

The Kunming Expo Gardens. It was like Epcot center with gardens from around the world. They had a funny parade of floats that zipped around the place. They drove sooo fast.

This was on display in the China Hall. We wonder if that's what the characters actually translate to.
It turns out the US exhibit was closed 2 years ago so the USA now only has a little booth in the International hall squeezed between Peru and Chile. Apparently Kunming's sister city is Denver CO. I think we need to get some Denver people out here to spruce up the exhibit. It had all these random outdated photographs of Colorado and San Francisco and other places. The other exhibits were selling souveniers from the area but the US one was selling some drugs or vitamins. They were Chinese medicines so who knows what that was all about. we all had a good laugh at the pathetic US exhibit.

Shopping near the hotel

Cute little boy hanging out watching his mom cook in the street.

This afternoon we went to Alyson and Natalie's finding spots. That was pretty hard and I did take some pictures but I'm saving them for now. It was hard to imagine the circumstances under which our girls were left to be found. We'll never have a complete story and I would love to have more of Alyson's history for her to have later. We learned a little about the area she was found in so we can make some guesses about her birth parents but there's not much to go on.

the important thing is she'll have a great life from here on out and she will always know that her first family loved her enough to make sure she was found and taken care of.

That's it for now :-)

just a quick update

2007-05-22T19:08:00.000-04:00

Hi Everyone, sorry for not posting last night. I'm getting some kind of chest cold and was running a fever yesterday so I was too pooped to post last night. I got a good night sleep so I'm doing ok. Alyson coughed quite a bit last night too but didn't cry.
Sometime yesterday afternoon she decided we're as good as it gets in terms of a family so she's really coming out of her shell. She has been talking up a storm and cruising all over the hotel room. She's into everything, especially the remote. She won't walk on her own but if you hold at least one hand she can practically run. She's smiling and giggling more. She's not too fond of hte camera so I haven't captured a smile yet.
We survived the Kunming Walmart. It's 3 stories and has just about anything you could need. Everything is so cheap. We got tons of stuff for I think $45. That would have been a $100 trip in the US easily. In the afternoon, Andrea and I walked down the street to pick up our laundry that we had dropped off yesterday. Laundry here is so funny. They press and fold everything and wrap it in plastic, even our underwear.
Walking back from the laundry we found a couple children's clothes stores and a cute baby store. I bought a stroller in the baby store for $15. It's a decent umbrella stroller. The baby carrier I brought, the playtex hip hammock, is terrible so we're hoping Alyson likes the stroller. She's a heavy wiggly monkey so carrying her is tough. She did enjoy the Walmart cart though so that bodes well since everyone knows how much time I spend in Target. It would not be good if she hated the cart.
She threw a proper toddler fit yesterday around 5 and we finally figured out that she was jsut hungry. We've forgotten about how much these little people need snack constantly or they get cranky. Other than that one fit, she's been great. There are more to come I'm sure :-)
Today we are going to the Expo garden, Kunming is known for it's flower production, then we are going to see Alyson and Natalie's finding spots. We found out the other day that Alyson was found a the #31 bus stop in Guandu. Tomorrow we will tour the orphanage and give them the extra baby supplies that we purchased at Wal Mart for them. On Friday we are going to a vilage.

I will try to post pictures tonight. I need to get little miss up and at em.

Love to all!

Adoption is complete!

2007-05-21T08:56:00.000-04:00

I think I forgot to mention before that we are traveling with a great family, John and Andrea Howorth, and their new baby Natalie. They are from Oregon. I am so happy to be going through this whole experience with them, they are the nicest people and I think we are really helping each other out. So many things are lost in translation with our guides and at restaurants so it's great to have people to laugh with (and cry with).

Alyson made huge strides today. This morning she woke up mad as heck that these strange white people were still in her room but by this evening she was like she's always been in our family. This morning Daddy was still the hero but she tolerated me ok. Just tolerated, but that is more than some families who experience complete rejection for several days/weeks. By this evening she actually reached out to me to pick her up. Daddy wasn't in the room so she didn't have a better choice but still it was huge. Actually this morning she fed me a cheerio too so we were already starting to be friends then. At lunch we were at the hotel buffet so Michael kept getting up and getting stuff and everytime she lost sight of him she would scrunch up her face like she was going to wail but she just wimpered until she could see him again.

Our girl is an eater. She snacked her way through most of the day and ate like a champ at lunch and dinner. She really likes the gerber sweet potatoe puffs. I forgot what it was like to eat with a 15 month old. The need for independence and wish to feed oneself with silverware coupled with the frustration of not really being able to feed oneself. Bailey is going to be camped out at her high chair for sure. She is still taking a bottle of formula in the morning and evening but she's real clear about when she's had enough. She let me hold her and feed her her bottle tonight and it was really sweet. Michael was sitting right there too but she let me do it.

She is so beautiful and has such a smooth doll face. Everyone around here thinks she's a boy though. Maybe I'll try a hair bow some day this week.

This morning we went back to the weird pseudo civil affairs office/apartment to actually finalize the adoption. It was a lot of paperwork but our Holt guide and local Yunnan guide were great about explaining it all and making sure we understood what we were signing. It was very organized chaos but it went fine. For Alyson's part she had to put a red footprint on the paperwork to seal the deal.

We found out at this meeting a little more about Alyson's history. We found out that when she was abandonded she was indeed found with a note. The orphanage is still refusing to give us a copy of it. They said that the note only had her birthdate on it but they will keep it on file and maybe someday Alyson can return to Kunming for a visit and request it herself. Yeah, I'm not going to hold my breath on that one. They also said they did not have her surgical records. They said the hospital would not relaese them to the orphanage. I asked if our US doctors could request them from the hospital and they said probably not. They are so strange and secretive about stuff. After some pleading and a few tears I finally gave up on both the note and the medical records. Good news is she looks healthy and her open heart surgery scar looks really good.

We also found out that her foster parents are farmers, thus her dark tan. She is used to being carried in a back carrier while the foster parents worked outside. The foster parents are in their 40s and have a middle school age son.

We're supposed to be getting translated copies of her "routine" tomorrow. Yeah, that will be helpful. At that point we will have had her for over 2 days, I think we've got her routine figured out. Just add that to the list of things that are a little off about this whole process.

After the adoption registration we went to get her passport photo then back to the hotel for lunch and a nap then back to the passport place to actually apply for her passport. It was a busy day. We had dinner tonight at a place called the Bluebird that has many western dishes. It was really good.

Well that's plenty of gabber, here's some pics:

sleeping beauty this morning, still in the clothes from when we got her yesterday. She was fighting us so hard and grieving so much that we didn't have the heart to strip her down and change into pajamas.

Me and my kids. Kids, plural. I have kids :-) Did I mention she's a thumb sucker? Big time. It's very sweet though. A little nap on the bus
The weird civil affairs office

The red ink footprint

Snacking. Did I mention that she is totally attached to this blankie? It's satin on one side and super soft on the other. I'm pretty sure it was a gift from our Holt secret pal awhile back. She attached to it right away last night when she was so distraught. She kept rubbing the satin between her fingers and bringing up to her face while she was sucking her thumb. We haven't gotten it away from her since.

Some men playing cards outside the passport building.

Our big girl is almost walking by herself. Pretty unsteady still but it won't be long. She's wearing the squeaky shoes that she was wearing when we got her. The shoes we brought are way too big but we're going to the Kunming Walmart tomorrow so we'll buy her another pair of shoes.

At the Green lake park near our hotel. Andrew is doing so well through all of this. He loves his Mei Mei! He's really doing well with being dragged from boring appointment to boring appointment.

A group of musicians in the park. Andrea and I took the kids for a walk in the park while John and Michael went for a run. That was some forced bonding for Alyson and I and I think that's when she really turned the corner towards accepting me.

Clean baby! She had her first bath tonight and seemed to like it pretty well. We kept it kind of quick so she wouldn't be overwhelmed but I think she's going to like tub baths just fine.

Farewell for now from Kunming :-)

We have Alyson

2007-05-20T08:09:00.000-04:00

We got Alyson today around 5PM. luckily I had read on other Kunming family blogs that the hand off would be in an apartment and not the civil affairs office so I wasn't totally disconcerted about our surroundings but the whole thing was very surreal. I trust our agency and the CCAA but the whole situation had an uneasy and kind of shady feeling. I won't expound on all that at the moment since this day is all about happy family :-)
The important thing is we got Alyson and she looks very healthy. She initally was ok with me and even slept for a bit on my chest while we rode the bus back to the hotel. She has cried a fair amount and ever since we got back to the room though she wants nothing to do with me. It's ok and very normal especially for a foster care baby to bond with Daddy first. She's a little hesitant with Michael too, she won't let him pick her up but she'll look at him and let him play with her.
As expected, she likes Andrew. He was the first to make her smile and even laugh a little. When I turn around to look at her and catch her smile she'll quickly frown.
She's talking a little bit (we're not sure what she's saying of course) and she seems pretty on target. She won't walk but that doesn't mean she can't. When they brought her in the room she was walking holding the caregiver's hands.
She feels like she's at least 20 pounds and the clothes she came in were a size 18 months pants and a 6-9 month shirt. The size 3 diapers we brought are a tad too big but they're ok.

I think that's it for the moment. I didn't sleep well at all last night so I'm ready for bed, we imagine she will be soon too. Right now she's playing with stacking cups and she let Michael feed her a bottle just a minute ago. She wouldn't let him hold her but she laid in the crib and let him hold the bottle.

We're happy but tired. We'll try to catch a smile on camera tomorrow for you all.

Love to all!

Saturday-orientation, Tianemen Square, Temple of Heaven

2007-05-19T06:41:00.000-04:00

Orientation was not a big deal since we already knew that we would not be getting any new information or photos of Alyson. It was just some general info and paperwork reminders. After that we went to lunch at another very westernized chinese restaurant. This one didn't even try to seem authentic, you could tell by the fact that there was silverware already on the table instead of chopsticks. The restuarant looked like it might be a tourist spot at lunchtime but a strip club by night. It was really funny. Here is a picture of the sinks in the restroom:

After lunch we went to Tianemen square. It was just like it looks like on TV. No way to describe it really. Andrew was like a rock star. Several people wanted to take their picture with him. He's being really nice about it and giving people his big cheesy grin for their pictures. Everyone is very nice but it's hard to get used to the way they have no concept of personal space.

This is a big olympic countdown clock. It's very obvious that the people of China are so proud to be hosting the olympics. This used to be the city gate in between the Forbidden city and the Imperial City. I think. It's hard to keep track of all the history. It's all amazing. We didn't actually go to the Forbidden city, there wasn't enough time. We really needed at least 1 more day in Beijing to see it all. Next stop was the Temple of Heaven. It was built in 1420 so the Emperor could have a place to worship heaven for a good harvest. It was renovated in 05-06 so the colors are really bright and impressive.
Our last stop today was the Pearl Market. What a crazy place that was! I could spend all day in there haggling for good prices on stuff. They have everything in there. On the 4th floor you could get anywhere from really cheap to really fancy expensive pearls. I think I did well and got 3 strands of middle range quality pearls. Kathy, I got a strand for you and a strand for Alyson that are identical then a pinkish strand for myself. We might find something we like even better in Guangzhou but I'm really happy with the one's we got. The ladies in the store were really nice and liked that we were in China to adopt. They gave us a little freshwater pearl bracelet for Alyson for free. We picked the pearls and they strung them and tied a double knot in between each pearl in 5 minutes. I chose claps that have the Chinese symbol for happiness on them.

Well, that's it for today. In the morning we fly to Kunming then we get Alyson at 3:30. Stay tuned...The good stuff is just beginning!!! :-) :-)

Comments

2007-05-18T20:15:00.001-04:00

Hi everyone, I just wanted to post a quick note to let you know that I have gotten all of your comments but I think I accidentally deleted a few instead of posting them. Blogger works here but it's all in Chinese so I'm kind of randomly clicking things from memory. But keep the comments coming, we love to hear from everyone :-)

Oh and Holli, I got your message. CONGRATULATIONS!!! We're so excited for you!
Take care all. We'll post more later!

Great Wall, Cloissone factory, Hutong tour

2007-05-18T09:34:00.000-04:00

We had the best weather today for climbing the wall. It wasn't cloudy or polluted and there was a nice breeze. Andrew and Michael climbed as high as they could on the section we went to. It was steep but amazing. We went to the MuTianYu section of the wall instead of the more popular BaDaLing section and it was a great decision. There were very few people there and no vendors on the actual wall. There were plenty of very aggressive vendors at the bottom near the exit but we survived them. The pictures don't do it justice. It was so surreal standing on such a huge piece of history.

View of the mountains from the wall:

Andrew, half way up the wall. He and Michael climbed to the highest point they could which is I think 3-4 more towers in this picture. Beyond that point the wall is broken and you can't continue.

After the wall we had lunch (a very westernized chinese lunch) at a cloissoine factory then saw the process of making the pieces, then had what they like to call "a shopping opportunity." There's no shortage of "shopping opportunities" here so it's funny how they try to entice us silly Americans to purchase things. They got a few of our dollars though. Mom, we got you some beads so you can make something crafty with them :-)

There's more to add but I have to go to sleep so I'll try to get some more pictures up tomorrow.

Tomorrow we have our agency orientation then a tour of Tianamen square and the Temple of Heaven. I think that's what we're doing. It's hard to keep track.

Goodnight!

We're here!

2007-05-17T02:45:00.000-04:00

We've survived our 40+ hours of travel and we're in our hotel in Beijing. Andrew was a great traveler and we had some cultural experiences but no problems. I think we all slept about 6-8 hours total in spurts. We're pretty tired but we're going to try to stay up until at least 7PM so we can get on track. As I type this it is about 3PM here so only 4 hours to go and we can crash!
Tomorrow we have to meet our guide in the lobby bright and early for our tour of the Great Wall and some other sightseeing.
It looks like connecting to blogger won't be too much of a problem so we'll try to post some pictures tomorrow. The only techy problem we might have is that I'm a dork and brought the wrong outlet adapter so at the moment we have no way of charging all our electronic stuff. We're waiting for housekeeping to bring us the right adaptor but since Michael had the conversation with the housekeeper in the hallway and there's quite the language barrier, she may think we want a tuna sandwich for all we know.
We'll try to get that worked out soon!
Hugs and kisses to everyone!

well, this is it

2007-05-14T21:00:00.000-04:00

We're leaving in the morning for our 4 leg journey across the globe. Next post will be from China!!
If we have trouble posting to blogger while we're there, you'll either not hear from us at all or our friend Natasha will post for us whatever we email her. We'll see how it goes. I don't think we'll have any technology troubles in Kunming or Guangzhou but I've heard Beijing can be tricky.
I'm sure all will go well but please keep us in your prayers :-)

48 hours until travel and we finally have Alyson's room ready!

2007-05-13T11:47:00.000-04:00

We're done using Alyson's room as packing central so I put all the finishing touches on it today like bringing in the bookcase, and the CD player and putting out some toys and books. It's all temporary since she'll only be in this room for 3 weeks before we move so it's not perfect but I'm happy with it :-)

We did buy a really pretty dresser that matches the crib but it's going to stay in the box until we move to Texas (one less piece of furniture for the movers to scratch).

4 More days!

2007-05-11T14:47:00.000-04:00

We leave in 4 days!! Crazy! The packing is coming along. We're allowed 3 checked bags that are 44 pounds each and I'm pretty sure Alyson's bag exceeds that. I haven't actually weighed it but it's pretty obvious just by looking at it. I have to do some rearranging to try to balance it out. It will all get figured out in time. (I've always excelled at last minute packing).

I'll check in again before we go :-)

Ladybug bracelet

2007-05-05T10:11:00.000-04:00

I just had to share this beautiful bracelet that our neighbor Marla bought for Alyson. She knows all about our ladybug obsession so she bought this at a Lia Sophia jewelry party. Isn't it adorable?!

Update on Alyson

2007-05-01T20:43:00.000-04:00

On Friday we received some current information on Alyson. We found out that she is in foster care and it sounds like she is recovering perfectly from her heart surgery. Her surgery was on March 7th. The report says that she is now 21 pounds but it's still hard to say how accurate that might be. Here's some of what the update said:

she is an active and energetic child. She smiles constantly. She can stand holding on to something and can walk steps being led by hands. She often climbs on the sofa to play alone. She tries to walk upstairs. She is close to the foster mother. She points at something she wants with a hand and gurgles. She can say “baba, mama”. She feeds herself food. She holds the bottle. She turns eyes to something daily used when the foster mother says it. She shares her food with the foster mother. She likes to play games with other children. She likes to play outside. Sometimes she fights with other children for a toy. She shows curious at something fresh.

She sounds a little feisty :-) Our son Andrew has always been a calm easy going kid so we're due for a rambunctious one!

Itinerary

2007-04-30T16:51:00.000-04:00

The arrangements have been made, the tickets are paid for and here's what we know:

May 15: Fly from home to Chicago to LA to Guangzhou to Beijing
May 17: Arrive in Beijing (yes, 2 days later)
May 18: Great Wall and other touring
May 19: Holt orientation then touring with group
May 20: Fly to Kunming-We should get Alyson on this day!!!
May 21: Kunming-Actual adoption takes place on this day
May 22: Kunming
May 23: Kunming
May 24: Kunming
May 25: Kunming (all these days in Kunming we are visiting Alyson's home province and waiting for her passport and I'm not sure what else).
May 26: Fly to Guangzhou
May 27: Guangzhou
May 28: Guangzhou
May 29: Guangzhou-Appointment at US Consulate
May 30: Guangzhou-Get Alyson's Visa
May 31: Guangzhou-just hanging out, shopping, wishing we had a flight home this day.
June 1: Fly from Guangzhou to LA, (Alyson becomes a citizen when we land), spend the night in LA
June 2: Fly from LA to home!!!!

It's a long trip but very exciting!

We have CA and travel dates!!

2007-04-26T22:46:00.000-04:00

We have a confirmed Consulate Appointment for May 29, 2007.

We will leave for China on May 15th and come home as a family of four on June 2nd!!

I will post our final itinerary after I actually pay for our tickets tomorrow. I don't want to jinx anything and we haven't handed over the credit card yet, but we're pretty darn sure we're leaving the 15th. That's 19 days from now!!!

We got our travel approval!!

2007-04-23T18:48:00.000-04:00

We got word of our travel approval today!! It's surreal. After all this time we really are going to go. I've been living the last many many months just waiting for the other shoe to drop or for someone to pull the rug out from under me or whatever cliche you want to use. Now it's really happening. I can't even describe the sense of relief I have now.

Our agency is trying to get us a Consulate appointment during the last week in May so that would mean we'd leave for China aroung the 15th.
Wow.

Michael is upstairs putting together the crib as I type. (We just bought it today.)

We should know more tomorrow about our travel dates tomorrow so stay tuned...

We got our LOA!!

2007-04-07T11:05:00.000-04:00

Our letter of acceptance or as China calls it, "letter seeking confirmation from adopter" arrived on Tuesday. It sat in the rain for a day because we were out of town and FedEX just left it on the porch without a bag, but we blow dried it, signed it, and it went back to China on Friday April 6, 2007. Yay!!! Our agency sent it to China with a cover letter explaining why it was wrinkled and faded (it was all their fault, but that's a whole other story/drama). They're confident that China won't reject it and require us to submit another one. We couldn't just sign a copy of it because it was an offical document from China with their red stamps (chops) on it and everything. The original had to be signed.

Now we wait for official travel approval which has been happening for other families around 2-4 weeks after sending the LOA back.

People who got their travel approvals in the last week are traveling anywhere from mid-April to mid May. If we get our TA in 2 weeks then there is a chance that we could go late May but only if there are still consulate appointments available. If they can get the most recent batch of people all scheduled to go before mid-May then we have a chance to sneak in before our mid June deadline.

If we don't make it before mid-June then we have to move to Texas first, renew our immigration approval, and get a new homestudy. We really don't know yet how long that all might delay us.

We could also be delayed if Alyson is not ready to travel yet if she is still recovering from her open heart surgery. Our agency has asked for another update with the exact date of her surgery and a prediction on when she will be ready to travel.

We have another tiny little issue that I'm not going to freak out about just yet but we still don't have Andrew's expidited passport. We applied on March 10th and paid the extra money to have it rushed and we were assured that we should have it in 4 weeks. Well, the tracking system online says they have no record of our application. I have emailed them and am waiting for a reply. The 1-800 number is impossible to get through on so we just have to keep trying. If we can get through to a human then there's still hope that they can figure it out and get his passport to us ASAP.
We still have to get our Visas too and we need the passport to do that so things could get a little hairy if we don't get it soon!!

We got an update on Alyson!

2007-03-29T10:28:00.000-04:00

Well, not exactly an update but we got answers to some specific questions we asked back in January when we first got her referral.

She has had her heart surgery!! The report is dated 3/28/07 and it says that she is still in the hospital but it doesn't say when the surgery actually was, just that it was "successful."
This is very exciting news but also so sad to know that she is in the hospital without a mommy or daddy :-(
Our agency assured us that the orphanage will have sent a caregiver to stay with her in the hospital and she will help with the care and feedings etc.
If her surgery has gone as it should then it is likely that that is the only surgery she will need. As much as we were prepared to have her surgery here in the US and go through all the worry and sleepless nights associated with it, it's a relief to know it is already done.

As for the less dramatic but still exciting details of the report...
She now weighs 19.8 pounds, she's 28.3 inches tall, and she has 2 teeth :-)
I plotted her growth on a Chinese growth chart and she is in the 50th percentile for weight and 10th percentile for height. Sounds just perfect to us!

Terrible dream last night

2007-03-20T12:42:00.000-04:00

I've been very jealous of all the other families that received updates on their children while they wait for travel approval so I think this dream I had last night is some kind of penance for jealousy.

I dreamt that we got an update on Alyson and it said that she is now 6 years old, is actually from Russia not China, she's 6'4" tall and she's autistic. I kept crying that I had wanted a child I could hold in my lap, not one that's 6 feet tall! There was a person from our agency with us in the dream and she kept apologizing that the child was actually from Russia and I was saying I don't care that she's from Russia, she's 6 feet tall! That's not right!!

Anyway, it was bizarre and I was soooo happy to wake up from that. I think I had strange dreams right before Andrew was born so maybe this is a sign that an actual update is on it's way or, even better, our LOA!
Keeping fingers crossed :-)

Alyson's room

2007-03-13T15:05:00.000-04:00

Because we're moving and we're not sure if it will be before or after we go get Alyson, we haven't put her room together yet. We haven't bought her crib yet but I did buy her bedding. Here's the online store photo:

I got a great deal on it on ebay. (It's from an ebay store so it's brand new :-)

Girl stuff!!

2007-03-13T14:53:00.000-04:00

We're finally swimming in girly things in this house! Our wonderful neighbor, Marla, brought over this huge box of girl clothes. The picture doesn't do it justice as far as how much stuff is in this box. Most of it is size 18 month summer clothes which will be fine even if it's too big since we're moving to Texas and it's farily warm in the winter there too.

Of course Bailey had to check it out.

Our report from when Alyson was 7 months old says that she weighed 17 pounds at that time. She was most likely weighed with a couple layers of clothes on so we don't know how much she really weighed so it's hard to guess what she weighs now. Not suprisingly, Chinese children are usually a little more petite than Caucasion children. I've read stories from other parents that their Chinese children in the 13-16 month age range were wearing American clothes as small as 6-9 month size. Good news is, I hear the shopping in China is great! So if we're totally wrong about her size, we'll just have to buy some clothes there! :-)

About Alyson's heart

2007-03-09T09:47:00.000-05:00

Alyson has an 8.5 mm VSD. That is a ventricular septal defect-a hole in her heart. From our extensive research and questioning of health care professionals, it seems that 8.5mm would be classified as a moderate to large hole.

Here are a couple links to websites that can explain a VSD much better than I can:

http://www.cincinnatichildrens.org/health/heart-encyclopedia/anomalies/vsd.htm

http://www.americanheart.org/presenter.jhtml?identifier=11066

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/ventricular-septal-defect/DS00614

We do not know at this time if Alyson will require surgery once she is home. Some VSDs close on their own or at least get small enough that she could just live with it. Even with a small hole though, if the heart is working too hard to compensate for it or the valves are getting weak and the chambers are getting enlarged, then surgery to repair the hole would be indicated.

Repair of a VSD entails open heart surgery with placement of a Gortex patch over the hole. Repair of atrial defects can frequently be done with a catheter procedure which is much less dramatic than open heart surgery but unfortunately that is not an option for Alyson since her defect is between the ventricles. Alyson's medical report indicates that she already has some enlargement of her heart and some regurgitation in 3 of the 4 valves (that means they are a little floppy and leaky). The valves could improve with growth alone but should definitely improve following surgery to repair the VSD. If one or more of the valves has become too weak to improve because of delay in repair of the VSD then she may require a valve replacement at some point. We're hoping that we can avoid that.

It is possible that Alyson has already had surgery in China but we have not received an update and may not ever. It is not entirely unusual for a family to not find out about further medical treatment that has been done for the child until they arrive in China. I have read about a family that was preparing for their new son from China to have surgery soon after his arrival in the USA but when they went to get him in China and were with him in the hotel room for their first night as a family, they removed his clothes to give him a bath and noticed a 6 inch scar on his chest! He had already had his open heart surgery and NO ONE said anything. The family had asked the nanny that handed them their son earlier that day how his health/heart was and she just nodded and smiled and said it was good. It didn't occur to her to mention that he had surgery 2 months ago. That seems crazy to Americans but the Chinese view the flow of information very differently.

The Chinese orphanage directors and staff care very much for the babies and would not hesitate to secure needed medical care including surgery for the children if they need it. It just doesn't seem to be a priority to them to update anyone on changes in medical status. We don't know if it's that the orphanage doesn't update the CCAA or if they do update the CCAA but the CCAA doesn't pass the information along to the agency that holds the child's file.

We requested an update 6 weeks ago today and our agency is trying to get one for us but the orphanage and/or the CCAA are under no obligation to provide an update if the information we have is less than a year old. Our information is from September 2006. :-(

The good news is that the Chinese doctors do an excellent job of repairing heart defects. Most of the US pediatric cardiologists that so follow-up echocardiograms on these kids have said that the repairs look great.

So at this point, our motto remains the same: Prepare for the worst but hope for the best! :-)

So what are we waiting for?

2007-03-08T09:37:00.000-05:00

If it was up to me, I'd be on a plane tomorrow to go get her but I'm not in charge.

What we are waiting for next is our Letter of Acceptance (LOA). This form will come from the CCAA (China Center for Adoption Affairs) and it basically will indicate that everything is in order and asks us if we accept our referral. We have to sign it and send it back then the CCAA will work on our Travel Approval (TA).

As far as timing, it's hard to say when we will get our LOA. Because our dossier was already out of review in the non-special needs process at the time we sent our Letter of Intent (3/2/07) we could in theory see our LOA fairly quickly (1-2 months). There are many families that have waited many months for their LOA/TA but most of them sent their dossiers later than us so it's hard to say if there's a real pattern to it. People who know me know how analytical I am and how desparately I try to figure out patterns and timing but in this case it's a bit random so I have to just be patient.

It appears that for most people the time frame from LOA to TA is about 3-4 weeks and the time from TA to actually getting on a plane to China is anywhere from 7 days to 6 weeks. Most people will have at least 2 weeks notice and there is some flexibility in travel plans once the travel approval has arrived. This is a good thing since we are moving to Texas the end of June.

As soon as we get travel approval I'm going to want to go get her, I don't want her to have to wait any longer because of our time constraints, but the reality is we cannot travel during the few weeks around our move. That's just how it is and it will all work out in the end :-)

So cross you fingers for an LOA early April, TA early May and getting on a plane late May!!
Ok, it's not likely but there's nothing wrong with dreaming!! :-)

Where in the world is Alyson?

2007-03-08T09:01:00.000-05:00

Alyson is in Kunming which is the capital city of the southern province of Yunnan, China.

Alyson is either residing in the Kunming City Social Welfare Insitute (orphanage) or is in foster care associated with that orphanage. According to the only information we have on her, from age 7 months old, she was in the orphanage but that could have changed at any time.

This is the Kunming City SWI:

Kunming means "eternal spring" so supposedly they have mild temperatures year round but summer is their rainy season.

Just a side note, right now the restaurant chain PF Changs is featuring a menu called "Flavors of Yunnan." I copied this info from their website:

The Yunnan Province is the most southwest province in China and is bordered by Vietnam, Laos, Myanmar and Tibet as well as the Chinese provinces of Sichuan and Guizhou and has one of the most diverse ethnic populations in China. The region has a wide range of weather conditions from snow-capped mountains and glaciers in the north to a mild spring climate in the central part to tropical rainforests in the south. The diversity of culture and climate is reflected in Yunnan cuisine. Some of the most unique foods found in the Yunnan Province include its famous cured Yunnan Ham (similar to Spanish Serrano Ham), cheese and dairy products, numerous varieties of mushrooms and chilies as well as fermented items, hearty noodles and pu’er tea. The Flavors of Yunnan menu is reflective of the unique ingredients found in this province.

The passage mentions the ethnic diversity of Yunnan province. When most Americans picture a Chinese person with typical Chinese features they are thinking of a member of the Han majority. But just as other ethnic groups have variations so do the Chinese. I'm not talking about obvious minority differences like Caucasion vs. Hispanic, It's more like within a Caucasion population there is a difference between someone of Irish descent vs. German descent.

Yunnan Province has the largest number of ethnic minorities in China, at least 25 recognized groups.

Several people have commented on Alyson's dark coloring and her more round eyes. Her features are similar to other babies from Kunming and we are pretty sure she is from an ethnic minority but I don't know how we'll ever know for sure which one. We'll never be able to tell from the 3 little pictures we have of her but hopefully as she grows up we can do more research and narrow it down for her.

About Alyson's name

2007-03-08T08:49:00.000-05:00

Alyson's Chinese name, Qian Wen, was given to her, as far as we know, by her orphanage staff. There are a few different Chinese characters for both Qian and Wen so it has taken us a little bit of research to figure out what her name means.

Here are the actual characters for her version of Qian Wen:

From what we can gather, the first character (Qian) means delicately pretty and the second character (Wen) means beautiful clouds. We originally thought it meant refinement or culture but that character is slightly different.

By the way, QianWen is pronounced "Chee-ann One"

About her English name...

We chose Alyson because I've always loved that name and the potential nickname Aly. My very best friend growing up was named Alyson. We've lost touch over the years but I have wonderful childhood memories of her and think of her often still.

We chose Mary as a middle name in honor of Michael's mom. He was just a toddler when she passed away but she is still very loved and much talked about in the family.

I'm Back to Blogging!

2007-03-07T13:41:00.000-05:00

Ok, Ok, I'll update my blog! :-)
I've been getting a little bit of grief for not posting anything since May of 06. I guess that is a long time! Sorry about that.

A lot has happened since our last post. No one wants to hear the boring stuff so I'll get straight to the good news:

It's a Girl!!

We received a suprise phone call from the waiting child department of our agency on January 22 saying that they had a file for a little girl that we may want to review. I was stunned. We said we would absolutely like to see her file! This is the inital information we got:

Name: Guan Qian Wen
DOB: February 4, 2006
Residing in Kunming Social Welfare Institute, Yunnan Province
Special need: Congenital heart defect (VSD)

Once we received her file via fedex the next day we sent it to a pediatric cardiologist in Massachucetts that re-translated her echo report for us and gave us an opinion on her prognosis. We also had her file reviewed by several nurses and doctors at Children's hospital in Denver. Our champion, Natasha made anyone and everyone at her hospital look at it and give an opinion !! (We owe you Natasha ;-)

In the end we decided that we could not only manage her health needs but she is perfect for our family and we think we are the perfect family for her.

It took us a few weeks to get a homestudy addendum and a new letter of application for China notarized, certified, and authenticated. We sent those as well as our official Letter of Intent to our agency on 2/23/07. Our agency sent it to China on 3/2/07.

Only other adoptive parents care about all those details. Here's what everyone else wants to see. Her picture!

Introducing Alyson Mary QianWen....

These pictures were taken when she was 7 months old. She is now 13 months old so we can only guess what she looks like today. We have requested updated info and photos from the orphanage but we may not receive any.

I'll post more info later!

Michael is home from Iraq!!

2006-05-29T18:18:00.000-04:00

I know I never mentioned it in this blog (for security reasons) but Michael has been in Baghdad for the last 4 1/2 months. He came home safe and sound this past Thursday.

Our neighbors made this slide to project on our garage door to celebrate his homecoming!

We have been very lucky to communicate daily by email and many phone calls but nothing is as good as being able to see his face again and know that he is safe.

Thank you everyone for all of your thoughts and prayers. It has meant a lot to both of us. Andrew and I are so proud of our hero and of all the good work he was able to accomplish while there. We are celebrating and grateful that he was able to come home on time but we have not forgotten, especially on this Memorial Day, that many families have not been so lucky.

Our thoughts and prayers are with all the remaining soldiers and their families that still have a long and worrisome wait to endure.

I won a contest!

2006-05-17T09:35:00.000-04:00

Woohoo! I'm royalty!

Ok, not real royalty but stamping royalty. I entered a handmade card into Paper Crafts magazine's Stamping Royalty contest and I won in the the category of color washes and distressing with ink. An editor called me on Monday to tell me the good news. I've won over $200 worth of stamping products that will be arriving in about 2 weeks, my card will be published in the November issue of the magazine, and I get to be a part of the design team for the magazine for the next year! I'm so excited!

The card I made is red, black, and tan and has the Chinese symbol for love as the focal image. Here's a link to the stamp set I used:

http://carolynh.myctmh.com/WebSites/Templates/MyCTMH/Template1.aspx?PageID=39411&Search=Yes

And here's a link to the magazine's website:

http://www.papercraftsmag.com/

I'm not sure when they'll post the list of winners on the website though. (I believe there are 20 winners total.)

I never did take a picture of the card before I mailed it in but I can't post it anyway until after it's published so we'll have to wait until the November issue comes out to see it.

Hmmm, I wonder if I'll get a tiara in my prize box?

(just kidding ;-)

Kittens

2006-05-08T10:03:00.000-04:00

We have known for awhile that there is a stray cat hanging out under our front steps. Bailey brilliantly decided to shove her head in the opening to this cavern of sorts under the steps and got a nice scratch on the nose for it. That was a few weeks ago. I thought it had left, but Bailey knew better. She has been hanging out at the front door and scratching at the little rug trying to "find" the cat. Last week I finally saw the real reason for the cat's stay. Five kittens! I've now been feeding them for almost a week while I formulate a plan for their future. One now has a permanent home with a neighbor but the 4 remaining will have to go to the Humane Society later this week. They are getting big and playful and eating some solid kitten food. They are at their most adoptable so I need to get them out of here. Andrew and I are quite attached though!

"I know there's something out there! Let me at it!"

Aren't they cute!?

I've been tagged!

2006-04-22T21:31:00.000-04:00

I've been tagged by fellow blogger Carrie. I'm supposed to post 6 weird things about myself, so here goes....

1. I don't like state fairs. Too many people, too many smells.

2. I don't like butterflies. They are just pretty moths and moths are creepy. My dislike of butterflies borders on phobia.

3. I can do a thumbs-up with my big toes. I used to think everyone could but it turns out it's a genetic trait like tongue curling (which by the way I can NOT do.)

4. I cannot sleep with any glowing light in a room ie digital clock, green dot on the cable TV box, etc. I swear I can still see it with my eyes closed. (Michael thinks that's crazy)

5. This probably isn't too weird, but I'm addicted to reality TV. Mostly American Idol, Amazing Race, and Survivor.

6. I'm allergic to coconut.

I'm sure my friends and family would have no problem making a list for me a mile long but these are the best 6 I could come up with. Now I'm off to go tag some other bloggers :-)

Letters to Congress

2006-04-18T14:26:00.000-04:00

With the increased wait for referral it has become evident that one of our most important adoption documents will potentially expire before we travel to get our daughter. Remember the cool "approval to bring an orhan into the US" letter that we were so excited to get in the mail back in January? Well it's only good for 18 months. That didn't used to be a problem. Now it might be, so it's been suggested by many that we all write letters to our senators and representatives to get them to extend the expiration so we don't all have to get re-fingerprinted and pay another huge chunk of money to reapply for a new approval letter.

Here's the letter that I wrote to send to my Ohio representative and senators:

April 18, 2006

The Honorable Mike DeWine
37 W. Broad St., Ste. 300
Columbus, OH 43215

Subject: Foreign adoption
Request: Please help extend expiration date of USCIS form I-171H

Dear Senator DeWine,

This letter is to voice my concern over the expiration timing of form I-171H (Notice of Favorable Determination Concerning Application for Advance Processing of an Orphan Petition) and the fingerprints associated with this approval process.

Currently, adoptive parents are required to resubmit to fingerprinting after 15 months, and resubmit the entire application after 18 months from date of initial approval. There is significant cost and burden time associated with both of these steps.

In recent months it has become clear that processing time for international adoption, from China specifically, will possibly exceed the 18 month expiration window. In the near future there will likely be an extraordinary number of families needing to reprocess paperwork if there are no changes to the current expiration dates.

Increasing the period of validity of this document to at least 24 months (preferably 36 months) would benefit both the adoptive families and the USCIS offices that are required to process numerous applications per year.

We realize your time is limited so we appreciate any attention you can give to this issue and any results you may be able to prompt on our behalf.

Sincerely,

my name

Any of our family or friends are more than welcome to copy this letter or write your own to your representatives to help all the adoptive parents plead their case :-)

You can find contact info for your state's people by going to www.congress.org

Thanks!!

Secret Pal swap

2006-04-13T09:47:00.000-04:00

We are in a secret pal gift exchange with other families from our agency that turned in their paperwork aobut the same time. We got our first gift this week. The theme was children's books. We were totally spoiled by our secret pal!
They gave us 7 books, a bib, a soft ladybug basket and a bunny that says "My First Easter."

Our social worker is moving

2006-04-13T09:39:00.000-04:00

We got an email last week and a hard copy letter yesterday from our homestudy agency that our social worker is moving and leaving her job :-(

We liked her. Even though our homestudy is complete we will still need post placement visits through this agency. I had a ton of questions that I was saving for her for when we get closer to referral but now we have to establish a relationship with someone new. They have not filled her position yet so I have no idea when we will be assigned a new person. I just liked knowing she was there if/when we needed her. ...sigh...

Funny bunnies

2006-04-10T18:10:00.000-04:00

I don't have anything adoption related to report so I'm posting this for everyone's amusement.
My dearest friend who truly knows my sense of humor emailed me this so I had to share :-)

We have a LID!

2006-03-28T23:44:00.000-05:00

We got the email today from our agency saying that our log in date (LID) was 3/14/06. That means our dossier has been officially acknowledged as being in existence by the China Center for Adoption Affairs.

This is good news :-)

It's a new day

2006-03-28T11:27:00.000-05:00

The news on the adoption front isn't any better today but I've decided that my outlook has to be.

This is a bit long but I wrote it out to respond to something on someone else's blog and I found it very cathartic to have put it down on paper (so to speak) so I felt it worthy of sharing here:

I think what this roller coaster is trying to do is to make me evaluate what we are trying to accomplish and why. I think Michael and I have come to the conclusion that we will wait for our daughter from China even if it takes 2 years.

I started to panic last week and wondered if we should switch countries or pursue other avenues to parenthood. I thought our ultimate goal was to have another child, any child, added to our family as soon as possible before our 7 year old son gets any older. Well it turns out, after some reflection, it's not about that. Michael and I actually really just want a little girl from China. And if she doesn't join our family until Andrew is 9 years old, so be it.

I've read where people have said they were "always drawn to China", or "I just know my daughter is in China", or "my HEART says China has the perfect little girl waiting for us", or the whole red thread thing. In the past I've thought I don't feel any of those things, I'm just selfish, I just want another kid and I want Andrew to have a sibling, I don't care how it happens.

The thoughts I had this week of bailing out of this process were so heartbreaking that I'm beginning to think maybe I'm as sappy as all the others and my heart really is in China. I've become quite attached to this almost mythical little person that may or may not be out there yet, and I want her to come home. If that means not getting her until November of 2007 then that's how it will be.

I'm not claiming that I'm not going to have any more "need a padded room" moments but at least today I feel a lot more peaceful about it all.

Disturbing but not suprising

2006-03-27T13:15:00.000-05:00

The Chinese adoption community is buzzing with rumors right now. The news of only 5 days worth of LID's being matched in the March batch has started a slew of new speculations. No one has the answers but China, and right now they're not talking. If they are sharing their projections with the agencies then the agencies aren't sharing them with their clients because the agencies appear to be making it up as they go along. My least favorite piece of info posted this week is:

"My Canadian agency said June will take 3 months to match and then they expect each month after to take two months to match."

If this is accurate, which it certainly seems possible, then we can hope for our referral to come in November or December of 2007. Yes, 2007.

This is my least favorite piece of info because it is likely the most true.

The hopeful news is that it is in everyone's best interest to not let wait times get that long. Who's going to do something about it or how is beyond me but I hope someone does.

There are agencies (not ours) that are actually sending out emails to their clients addressing the concerns and giving predictions about the future wait times. These have ranged from 10-18 months. One agency is actually still saying that for people logged in this month their wait should be 10-11 months. That's impossible at this point. Another agency has told a client with a November LID to expect an 18 month wait. That's possible.

There's no actual point in my posting this information, just venting I guess.

visited states map

2006-03-24T14:42:00.000-05:00

I've seen this on several blogs so I jumped on the bandwagon too. You can go to this website to plot all the states you've visited http://douweosinga.com/projects/visitedstates

Here are my results:

To be truthful a handful of these were only a drive through and Kentucky was just an accident. (No offense Kentucky, we just missed our exit south of Cincinnati and before we knew it we saw the "Welcome to Kentucky" sign.)

The states I've actually lived in are: New Mexico, Missouri, Arizona, California, Colorado, and Ohio.
(Sort of long list thanks to the USAF :-)

NY Times article

2006-03-23T12:11:00.000-05:00

Here's the link to a nice article related to China adoption.

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/03/23/national/23adopt.html?hp&ex=1143176400&en=6818f21a14894529&ei=5094&partner=homepage

I'd like to put my head in a box too

2006-03-22T08:51:00.000-05:00

Bailey has the right idea. Hide in a diet coke box until there is better news about referrals. The current rumor is that the next batch of referrals will only cover LIDs through the end of May 05. It's just a rumor so there is no proof until the referral batch actually arrives. That may be next week or the first week of April.

If it's true, it's distressing beyond words. I don't even want to speculate about what this pace could mean for our timing, anything could still change. I just can't imagine what the people with early June LIDs are going through right now. I hope it's all a bad dream and all of June gets referrals so we can get back on track with a slightly predictable pattern.

I've been bit by the shopping bug!

2006-03-13T17:23:00.000-05:00

Up to this point all I have purchased for our daughter was the gymboree blanket and socks but today I was in Once Upon A Child (a resale shop) to get Andrew a green shirt for Friday. I was just going to glance at the little girl clothes but something overcame me and before I knew it I was at the register with 5 items (plus 2 shirts for Andrew). My older sister says it's a genetic problem that our Mom has too. We buy things that aren't even practical. (So Mom if you are reading this, Kathy said it's your fault :-)

I don't even know when we'll get our daughter, what size she'll be in what season or if I can even make her wear a dress but I bought stuff anyway! I bought size 18 months thinking that might be her size next summer but who knows! But they're so cute, right?

Yes, it's an illness and I think a monster has been unleased. Look out Target and Babies R Us, you might be next!

Our Soccer Superstar

2006-03-12T13:44:00.000-05:00

Yesterday Andrew scored the first goal for his indoor soccer team! The team has had a rough start and had yet to score in 5 games until yesterday. They had been taking it well and showing good sportsmanship but you just know they want to win at least once. Yesterday's game ended 1-1. It was a win in their eyes. The kids all shouted at the end, "We didn't LOSE!"
When Andrew scored, all the parents went crazy clapping, cheering and jumping up and down. The other team's parents looked at us like we were nuts over just one goal. They obviously had no idea it was the first goal ever for these poor kiddos.
We didn't overdo the spotlight on Andrew and praised all the kids on their teamwork. Andrew even wrote this in his journal last night: "My friend Eric helped me score a goal at soccer today."
Aww. That was with no prompting from me! I'm so proud of him!!

Won't get a log in date for awhile

2006-03-11T22:21:00.000-05:00

Nothing really going on, just realized it's been 10 days since I put anything on the blog so here's an update.

I emailed our agency to to find out if they had heard anything about when our LID (log in date) might have been/will be and the response was that they don't expect to find out what it was for a few weeks to a couple more months.

It's not a big deal really as I have every reason to believe our dossier has been logged in in China or is about to be but it's mainly a curiosity factor as to what that date may be.

I had originally hoped the LID would be late February so our DTC and LID would both be in February but it doesn't matter. Come time for referral, the cut off for the batch of referrals in a given month could just as easily be the 20th of one month or the 10th of the next or any date for that matter. So there's little logic to hoping that having a Feb 28th LID will bring us a referral any sooner than a March 10th LID but the earlier the better with the way things are going these days.

The buzz of interest at the moment is that it appears all the June, July and August dossiers are out of the "review room" in China. This means the only thing left for those people is for their dossier to sit in a pile in the "matching room" and to wait to be matched with their baby. Just because those month's dossiers are in the matching room does not mean that the next batch of referrals will include all those dates but it's a good sign of potential speeding up at the China Center for Adoption Affairs.

Time will tell.

Some folks got referrals this week

2006-03-01T15:22:00.000-05:00

So the people with LIDs from May 14, 2005 through May 25, 2005 got their referrals yesterday. Well I should say several of those people got theirs. Apparently referrals for at least two agencies are lost in the mail. Supposedly the CCAA uses DHL to send referrals to the agencies then most agencies use fedex to send the packets to the parents. It sounds like DHL has "misplaced" the packets. I haven't read anything more about it today but hopefully the families that are still waiting will hear something soon.

The referral, by the way, contains the baby's picture and varying amounts of medical and other info about the baby/child. People who have recived their baby information this week will hopefully travel to China in 6-10 weeks to be united with their child.

It's pretty discouraging for only 10 days worth of LIDs to be matched this month but there's no way of predicting what will happen next month. For the most part it appears that the CCAA sends referrals only once a month but it has done two batches in a month previously so anything can happen. All I know is that if they continue to match only 10-15 days worth of LIDs per month then we have a loooooong way to go.

Here's a quote I wish I could embrace but I don't think I have the patience of Maya Angelou. I'll try though.

Since time is the one immaterial object which we cannot influence--neither speed up nor slow down, add to nor diminish-- it is an imponderably valuable gift.
--Maya Angelou

The price of parenting

2006-02-23T12:24:00.000-05:00

I think this has been around before but a friend just emailed it to me again so I wanted to share it.

The government recently calculated the cost of raising a child from birth to 18 and came up with $160,140 for a middle income family. Talk about sticker shock! That doesn't even touch college tuition. But $160,140 isn't so bad if you break it down.
It translates into:
a.. $8,896.66 a year,
b.. $741.38 a month, or
c.. $171.08 a week.
d.. That's a mere $24.24 a day!
e.. Just over a dollar an hour.

Still, you might think the best financial advice is don't have children if you want to be "rich." Actually, it is just the opposite.

What do you get for your $160,140?
a.. Naming rights. First, middle, and last!
b.. Glimpses of God every day.
c.. Giggles under the covers every night.
d.. More love than your heart can hold.
e.. Butterfly kisses and Velcro hugs.
f.. Endless wonder over rocks, ants, clouds, and warm cookies.
g.. A hand to hold, usually covered with jelly or chocolate.
h.. A partner for blowing bubbles, flying kites
i.. Someone to laugh yourself silly with, no matter> what the boss said or how your stocks performed that day.

For $160,140, you never have to grow up.
You get to:
a..finger-paint,
b..carve pumpkins,
c.. play hide-and-seek,
d.. catch lightning bugs, and
e.. never stop believing in Santa Claus.

You have an excuse to:
a.. keep reading the Adventures of Piglet and Pooh,
b.. watching Saturday morning cartoons,
c.. going to Disney movies, and
d.. wishing on stars.

You get to frame rainbows, hearts, and flowers under refrigerator magnets and collect spray painted noodle wreaths for Christmas, hand prints set in clay for Mother's Day, and cards with backward letters for Father's Day.

For $160,140, there is no greater bang for your buck. You get to be a hero just for:
a.. retrieving a Frisbee off the garage roof,
b.. taking the training wheels off a bike,
c.. removing a splinter,> d.. filling a wading pool
e.. coaxing a wad of gum out of bangs, and coaching a baseball team that never wins but always gets treated to ice cream regardless.

You have all the power to heal a boo-boo, scare away the monsters under the bed, patch a broken heart, police a slumber party, ground them forever, and love them without limits,

So . . one day they will, like you, love without counting the cost. That is quite a deal for the price!!!!!!! (Even with the added $20,000+ for adopting parents!)

Love & enjoy your children & grandchildren!!!!!!!

Nothing to report

2006-02-22T11:56:00.000-05:00

It seems that time is standing still now that we are officially waiting and no longer have any control in the process. There is talk of a batch of referrals coming next week for families that were logged in May 13, 2005 through maybe early June. The next batch may come late March and have matches for families that were logged in the rest of June. And so the process goes. You can see how this process can become exponentially longer with each passing month if the CCAA can't catch up and make more matches each month. I think most parents that are waiting like us have faith that the CCAA is doing the best they can but it is a little disheartening to wait longer and longer. We don't even have our log in date (LID) yet but I'm sure we will soon. We may already be logged in but won't receive notice of the actual date for awhile longer.

I caved-I made a purchase

2006-02-16T12:34:00.000-05:00

I don't know when I thought I would start shopping but it definately wasn't going to be until "later." Well I guess "later" is here because I made my first purchase. I had to do something to celebrate being DTC so this weekend I bought my daughter a blanket and socks from Gymboree's popular ladybug line. I can't believe I'm shopping for girl stuff!!

I don't know if I've mentioned it in previous entries or not, but ladybugs seem to be a symbol of Chinese adoption among Americans. There's a superstition that ladybug sightings are linked to referrals being on the way. We have had some ladybug moments along the way like on October 31st 2005 we encountered a swarm of them outside Andrew's pediatrician's office. We were taking him for a physical for our home study and we thought it was interesting to be doing something adoption related and to encounter literally hundreds of ladybugs!

I'm pretty superstitious so I think maybe our daughter was born on that day. It's possible. I think it would be fun to have a birthday on Halloween! We'll see. When we get closer to referral maybe I'll start a pool for guessing her birthday. I'm sticking with Oct 31st or maybe Feb 8th (no ladybug sighting, just a feeling).

The news we have been waiting for!

2006-02-09T14:38:00.000-05:00

Our dossier specialist from Holt called this afternoon to say our dossier looks great and it's going to China tomorrow!!! So our DTC date is 2/10/06. WooHoo-we're getting in line now!!!

Doing the happy dance!!

Update

2006-02-08T10:03:00.000-05:00

Hi everyone! I emailed our dossier specialist at our agency yesterday to check on our status and she said she was hoping to review it by Friday. She didn't specify if she hopes she can review it time to be sent to China this Friday or if she just thought she would get to it on Friday. I didn't want to email her back to have her clarify so I'll just have to see. She said she would call and let me know how the review went. I'm still crossing my fingers that there are no errors or other problems.
Wish us luck!

Poem

2006-02-03T15:18:00.000-05:00

Here's a beautiful poem for waiting parents...

I HAVE A PICTURE FRAME (author unknown)

I have a picture frame
on my dresser to hold
your little face
awaiting there for you.

I have a picture frame
on my table top
reminding me you are waiting too
just how long I know not.

I have a picture frame
by my kitchen sink
my daily chores I faithfully work
and often of you think.

Daddy has a picture frame
in his heart you see
daughters have daddy's love
their blessing they will be.

Grandma has a picture frame
beside her other ones
reserved for you amonst them all
a granddaughter she'll have won.

I have a picture frame
on a chain of gold
to remind me that you are there
waiting for my arms to hold.

Dossier is on it's way to Holt!

2006-01-30T16:41:00.000-05:00

Woohoo! We are done for now with our portion of the paperwork! Our dossier is on it's way right this moment to Holt, our adoption agency. Now it will wait in line to get reviewed before going to China. Here's a picture of the certified and authenticated documents and required pictures that are included. The pages from the Chinese consulate, with the red seals, are actually very pretty in person. We've worked on getting this stack of papers since the end of September so it's a little weird to be sending it off and know we'll never see it again.

Our agency sends dossiers to China every Friday so if all goes well and there are no errors or revisions needed, then our dossier could be on it's way to China on February 10th. That's the earliest it could go. It's much more likely that it will be the 17th, or even the 24th. We'll have to wait and see. The day it goes to China (or DTC date) is significant because that's when the wait for referral officially begins in the eyes of our agency. In China's eyes the wait begins with the log in date (or LID), which occurs anywhere from 4 days to 6 weeks after DTC. It doesn't matter really as long as you know what date you are looking at in reference to what. For example The China Center for Adoption Affairs posts information about referrals based on LID. On Jan 25th all the people with a LID of April 26, 05-May 13, 05 received their referrals.

It's very exciting each month to see where the CCAA is at as far as processing but how many LIDs they match at a time totally varies. The people who received their referrals on the 25th should be traveling to pick up their daughters in 6-8 weeks (hopefully.) It's very exciting and we can't wait until it's our turn!
Thanks for continuing to follow this journey with us!!

Happy New Year!

2006-01-28T20:40:00.000-05:00

Chinese New Year begins tomorrow.
I "borrowed" the following information from this website: www.educ.uvic.ca/faculty/mroth/438/CHINA/chinese_new_year.html

Chinese New Year starts with the New Moon on the first day of the new year and ends on the full moon 15 days later. The 15th day of the new year is called the Lantern Festival, which is celebrated at night with lantern displays and children carrying lanterns in a parade.

The Chinese calendar is based on a combination of lunar and solar movements. The lunar cycle is about 29.5 days. In order to "catch up" with the solar calendar the Chinese insert an extra month once every few years (seven years out of a 19-yearcycle). This is the same as adding an extra day on leap year. This is why, according to the solar calendar, the Chinese New Year falls on a different date each year.

New Year's Eve and New Year's Day are celebrated as a family affair, a time of reunion and thanksgiving. The celebration was traditionally highlighted with a religious ceremony given in honor of Heaven and Earth, the gods of the household and the family ancestors.

The sacrifice to the ancestors, the most vital of all the rituals, united the living members with those who had passed away. Departed relatives are remembered with great respect because they were responsible for laying the foundations for the fortune and glory of the family.

The presence of the ancestors is acknowledged on New Year's Eve with a dinner arranged for them at the family banquet table. The spirits of the ancestors, together with the living, celebrate the onset of the New Year as one great community. The communal feast called "surrounding the stove" or weilu. It symbolizes family unity and honors the past and present generations.

Tomorrow the Year of the Dog begins.

This is what I found out about the year of the dog:

1922, 1934, 1946, 1958, 1970, 1982, 1994, 2006
People born in the Year of the Dog possess the best traits of human nature. They have a deep sense of loyalty, are honest, and inspire other people's confidence because they know how to keep secrets. But Dog People are somewhat selfish, terribly stubborn, and eccentric. They care little for wealth, yet somehow always seem to have money. They can be cold emotionally and sometimes distant at parties. They can find fault with many things and are noted for their sharp tongues. Dog people make good leaders. They are compatible with those born in the Years of the Horse, Tiger, and Rabbit.

We are pretty sure our daughter was born in the year of the rooster since we have requested a 12-18 month old child and we hope to have her join our family in about 10-12 months.
This is what I found out about the year of the rooster:

1921, 1933, 1945, 1957, 1969, 1981, 1993, 2005
People born in the Year of the Rooster are deep thinkers, capable, and talented. They like to be busy and are devoted beyond their capabilities and are deeply disappointed if they fail. People born in the Rooster Year are often a bit eccentric, and often have rather difficult relationship with others. They always think they are right and usually are! They frequently are loners and though they give the outward impression of being adventurous, they are timid. Rooster people¡¦s emotions like their fortunes, swing very high to very low. They can be selfish and too outspoken, but are always interesting and can be extremely brave. They are most compatible with Ox, Snake, and Dragon.

Be sure to check out the New Year's superstitions on the website linked above. It is very interesting and I plan to abide by the no housecleaning or sweeping one!

I hope you all find this interesting and informative. I am thoroughly enjoying gathering all kinds of information about our future daughter's homeland, traditions and customs to share with her as she grows.

A Quote

2006-01-26T07:56:00.000-05:00

"They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken." ~Author Unknown

This has nothing to do with adoption but I came across it and thought it was funny. No wonder the author is "unknown." What man is going to own up to saying that! :-)

An interesting link

2006-01-25T17:47:00.000-05:00

I don't have a progress report today, just waiting for documents to return from the New York Chinese Consulate.
I just wanted to point people to a website that has a great timeline on the history of adoption in the United States. Be sure to check out the link in the 1955 block about Bertha and Harry Holt. They are the original founders of the adoption agency we are using. They were pioneers in Korean adoptions and continue to be highly respected in international adoption.
Some interesting stuff!
Here's the link:
http://www.uoregon.edu/~adoption/timeline.html

A step closer

2006-01-23T14:22:00.000-05:00

Ok, it's a baby step (no pun intended) but it's a step.
I got our I-171H county and state certified today and sent 11 documents via fedex to the courier in New York. They will take them to the Chinese Consulate tomorrow for authentication. They should be able to pick them up on Friday and fedex them back.

It's here!!

2006-01-20T19:01:00.000-05:00

The coveted I-171H arrived today! This is a very exciting milestone. The headline on the letter says "NOTICE OF FAVORABLE DETERMINATION CONCERNING APPLICATION FOR ADVANCE PROCESSING OF ORPHAN PETITION" (It actually is in all caps on the letter, I'm not just screaming it.) Then it says "It has been determined that you are able to furnish proper care to an oprhan or orphans as defined by section 101bF of the immigration and nationality act." Isn't that sweet? You won't find that sentence on a pregnancy test box!! We now have proof that the US government thinks we can be parents! It does clarify at the bottom that we are approved for ONE ORPHAN (not orphanS). I just think it's so funny how the government writes stuff. I may be joking about it but really it's the best news. We are another step closer to our daughter!
I went and got a photocopy of it notarized this afternoon so now I get to go on Monday to the county clerk and the secretary of state before fedexing it to the Chinese Consulate in NY. If it gets there by 10:30 Tuesday morning our courier should be able to get our documents authenticated before the New York consulate closes for a few days to celebrate the Chinese New Year which, by the way, starts January 29th. I'll keep updating with the steps that come after that.
We're almost done with the paperwork Mei Mei! Hang in there!

Update

2006-01-19T15:32:00.000-05:00

The weirdest thing happened. The mail came twice today. I saw him pull up and deliver mail about noon then another guy came and delivered some more mail about 3:00. I'm not sure I've ever gotten mail twice in one day. Not suprisingly, the I-171H was not in either batch. But wait, there's good news! After 4 attempts this afternoon, I actually spoke to a human being at the Cincinnati USCIS office and she said we were approved on January 11th and she thinks the I-171H was mailed out yesterday. Woohoo! So maybe just a day or two more of stalking the mailman...for now.

Bailey will take care of it

2006-01-19T10:51:00.000-05:00

I've decided to let our dog Bailey get the mail from now on since it's just junk these days.

(Just kidding-she just really likes cardboard to tear apart so this was a treat for her.)

Still no 171H

2006-01-18T21:36:00.000-05:00

The mail was just as disappointing today. That's all I have to report.

No I-171H today

2006-01-17T17:14:00.000-05:00

The mail just came, no 171H in it. I quickly thumbed through the mail and saw a return address with "Approval Department" above it. I got all excited then saw it was just a credit card offer. Like the USCIS is going to have "Approval Department" in their return address. I'm starting to lose it. When I called on Jan 5th to inquire about the status of our approval the lady said it would be here in "2 weeks, maybe one." Hasn't it been that long? Sigh.

Quote of the day...

2006-01-17T08:50:00.000-05:00

"There's a skinny women inside of me screaming to get out, but I can usually shut her up with a cupcake."

Ok, I'm off to the gym.

Mei Mei

2006-01-16T14:44:00.000-05:00

Mei Mei? Who's, what's Mei Mei? It's little sister in Chinese.
In September 2005 we began our official journey towards expanding our family. We have chosen to adopt from China and are almost done with the bulk of our paperwork. Once our paperwork is done and officially "logged-in" then we are still looking at a 8-12 month wait for a referral. We have requested a healthy girl aged 12-18 months old, so in all likelihood she has already been born! She is out there somewhere in China waiting for us.

The final piece of the paperwork puzzle (or the long pole in the tent, as Michael calls it) is a document called I-171H. It is approval from the US Government for us bring an orphan into the US. It should be here any day now, then I have to make a copy of it, get the copy notarized, go to Columbus to have the secretary of state of Ohio put an official seal on it, then send it to the Chinese Consulate in NY to have it "authenticated" (basically put their fancy seal on it too :-). Whew! Sound like a lot? Well I've already done it for 12 other documents so it's under control.

Once the whole pile of paper is done it goes to our agency, Holt International in Oregon, for review. They can take up to two weeks to review our dossier before sending it to China where it will be logged in and reviewed by people at the Chinese Center of Adoption Affairs. 8-12 months later, our dossier will hit the matching room where a child's file will be matched up with ours. Once we accept our referral we should be traveling to China 6-8 weeks later to be united with our daughter!

Thanks for joining us on this journey!
Check back often for updates.