We got the email today from our agency saying that our log in date (LID) was 3/14/06. That means our dossier has been officially acknowledged as being in existence by the China Center for Adoption Affairs.
This is good news :-)
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
It's a new day
The news on the adoption front isn't any better today but I've decided that my outlook has to be.
This is a bit long but I wrote it out to respond to something on someone else's blog and I found it very cathartic to have put it down on paper (so to speak) so I felt it worthy of sharing here:
I think what this roller coaster is trying to do is to make me evaluate what we are trying to accomplish and why. I think Michael and I have come to the conclusion that we will wait for our daughter from China even if it takes 2 years.
I started to panic last week and wondered if we should switch countries or pursue other avenues to parenthood. I thought our ultimate goal was to have another child, any child, added to our family as soon as possible before our 7 year old son gets any older. Well it turns out, after some reflection, it's not about that. Michael and I actually really just want a little girl from China. And if she doesn't join our family until Andrew is 9 years old, so be it.
I've read where people have said they were "always drawn to China", or "I just know my daughter is in China", or "my HEART says China has the perfect little girl waiting for us", or the whole red thread thing. In the past I've thought I don't feel any of those things, I'm just selfish, I just want another kid and I want Andrew to have a sibling, I don't care how it happens.
The thoughts I had this week of bailing out of this process were so heartbreaking that I'm beginning to think maybe I'm as sappy as all the others and my heart really is in China. I've become quite attached to this almost mythical little person that may or may not be out there yet, and I want her to come home. If that means not getting her until November of 2007 then that's how it will be.
I'm not claiming that I'm not going to have any more "need a padded room" moments but at least today I feel a lot more peaceful about it all.
This is a bit long but I wrote it out to respond to something on someone else's blog and I found it very cathartic to have put it down on paper (so to speak) so I felt it worthy of sharing here:
I think what this roller coaster is trying to do is to make me evaluate what we are trying to accomplish and why. I think Michael and I have come to the conclusion that we will wait for our daughter from China even if it takes 2 years.
I started to panic last week and wondered if we should switch countries or pursue other avenues to parenthood. I thought our ultimate goal was to have another child, any child, added to our family as soon as possible before our 7 year old son gets any older. Well it turns out, after some reflection, it's not about that. Michael and I actually really just want a little girl from China. And if she doesn't join our family until Andrew is 9 years old, so be it.
I've read where people have said they were "always drawn to China", or "I just know my daughter is in China", or "my HEART says China has the perfect little girl waiting for us", or the whole red thread thing. In the past I've thought I don't feel any of those things, I'm just selfish, I just want another kid and I want Andrew to have a sibling, I don't care how it happens.
The thoughts I had this week of bailing out of this process were so heartbreaking that I'm beginning to think maybe I'm as sappy as all the others and my heart really is in China. I've become quite attached to this almost mythical little person that may or may not be out there yet, and I want her to come home. If that means not getting her until November of 2007 then that's how it will be.
I'm not claiming that I'm not going to have any more "need a padded room" moments but at least today I feel a lot more peaceful about it all.
Monday, March 27, 2006
Disturbing but not suprising
The Chinese adoption community is buzzing with rumors right now. The news of only 5 days worth of LID's being matched in the March batch has started a slew of new speculations. No one has the answers but China, and right now they're not talking. If they are sharing their projections with the agencies then the agencies aren't sharing them with their clients because the agencies appear to be making it up as they go along. My least favorite piece of info posted this week is:
"My Canadian agency said June will take 3 months to match and then they expect each month after to take two months to match."
If this is accurate, which it certainly seems possible, then we can hope for our referral to come in November or December of 2007. Yes, 2007.
This is my least favorite piece of info because it is likely the most true.
The hopeful news is that it is in everyone's best interest to not let wait times get that long. Who's going to do something about it or how is beyond me but I hope someone does.
There are agencies (not ours) that are actually sending out emails to their clients addressing the concerns and giving predictions about the future wait times. These have ranged from 10-18 months. One agency is actually still saying that for people logged in this month their wait should be 10-11 months. That's impossible at this point. Another agency has told a client with a November LID to expect an 18 month wait. That's possible.
There's no actual point in my posting this information, just venting I guess.
"My Canadian agency said June will take 3 months to match and then they expect each month after to take two months to match."
If this is accurate, which it certainly seems possible, then we can hope for our referral to come in November or December of 2007. Yes, 2007.
This is my least favorite piece of info because it is likely the most true.
The hopeful news is that it is in everyone's best interest to not let wait times get that long. Who's going to do something about it or how is beyond me but I hope someone does.
There are agencies (not ours) that are actually sending out emails to their clients addressing the concerns and giving predictions about the future wait times. These have ranged from 10-18 months. One agency is actually still saying that for people logged in this month their wait should be 10-11 months. That's impossible at this point. Another agency has told a client with a November LID to expect an 18 month wait. That's possible.
There's no actual point in my posting this information, just venting I guess.
Friday, March 24, 2006
visited states map
I've seen this on several blogs so I jumped on the bandwagon too. You can go to this website to plot all the states you've visited http://douweosinga.com/projects/visitedstates
Here are my results:
To be truthful a handful of these were only a drive through and Kentucky was just an accident. (No offense Kentucky, we just missed our exit south of Cincinnati and before we knew it we saw the "Welcome to Kentucky" sign.)
The states I've actually lived in are: New Mexico, Missouri, Arizona, California, Colorado, and Ohio.
(Sort of long list thanks to the USAF :-)
Here are my results:
To be truthful a handful of these were only a drive through and Kentucky was just an accident. (No offense Kentucky, we just missed our exit south of Cincinnati and before we knew it we saw the "Welcome to Kentucky" sign.)
The states I've actually lived in are: New Mexico, Missouri, Arizona, California, Colorado, and Ohio.
(Sort of long list thanks to the USAF :-)
Thursday, March 23, 2006
NY Times article
Here's the link to a nice article related to China adoption.
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/03/23/national/23adopt.html?hp&ex=1143176400&en=6818f21a14894529&ei=5094&partner=homepage
http://www.nytimes.com/2006/03/23/national/23adopt.html?hp&ex=1143176400&en=6818f21a14894529&ei=5094&partner=homepage
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
I'd like to put my head in a box too
Bailey has the right idea. Hide in a diet coke box until there is better news about referrals. The current rumor is that the next batch of referrals will only cover LIDs through the end of May 05. It's just a rumor so there is no proof until the referral batch actually arrives. That may be next week or the first week of April.
If it's true, it's distressing beyond words. I don't even want to speculate about what this pace could mean for our timing, anything could still change. I just can't imagine what the people with early June LIDs are going through right now. I hope it's all a bad dream and all of June gets referrals so we can get back on track with a slightly predictable pattern.
Monday, March 13, 2006
I've been bit by the shopping bug!
Up to this point all I have purchased for our daughter was the gymboree blanket and socks but today I was in Once Upon A Child (a resale shop) to get Andrew a green shirt for Friday. I was just going to glance at the little girl clothes but something overcame me and before I knew it I was at the register with 5 items (plus 2 shirts for Andrew). My older sister says it's a genetic problem that our Mom has too. We buy things that aren't even practical. (So Mom if you are reading this, Kathy said it's your fault :-)
I don't even know when we'll get our daughter, what size she'll be in what season or if I can even make her wear a dress but I bought stuff anyway! I bought size 18 months thinking that might be her size next summer but who knows! But they're so cute, right?
Yes, it's an illness and I think a monster has been unleased. Look out Target and Babies R Us, you might be next!
Sunday, March 12, 2006
Our Soccer Superstar
Yesterday Andrew scored the first goal for his indoor soccer team! The team has had a rough start and had yet to score in 5 games until yesterday. They had been taking it well and showing good sportsmanship but you just know they want to win at least once. Yesterday's game ended 1-1. It was a win in their eyes. The kids all shouted at the end, "We didn't LOSE!"When Andrew scored, all the parents went crazy clapping, cheering and jumping up and down. The other team's parents looked at us like we were nuts over just one goal. They obviously had no idea it was the first goal ever for these poor kiddos.
We didn't overdo the spotlight on Andrew and praised all the kids on their teamwork. Andrew even wrote this in his journal last night: "My friend Eric helped me score a goal at soccer today."
Aww. That was with no prompting from me! I'm so proud of him!!
Saturday, March 11, 2006
Won't get a log in date for awhile
Nothing really going on, just realized it's been 10 days since I put anything on the blog so here's an update.
I emailed our agency to to find out if they had heard anything about when our LID (log in date) might have been/will be and the response was that they don't expect to find out what it was for a few weeks to a couple more months.
It's not a big deal really as I have every reason to believe our dossier has been logged in in China or is about to be but it's mainly a curiosity factor as to what that date may be.
I had originally hoped the LID would be late February so our DTC and LID would both be in February but it doesn't matter. Come time for referral, the cut off for the batch of referrals in a given month could just as easily be the 20th of one month or the 10th of the next or any date for that matter. So there's little logic to hoping that having a Feb 28th LID will bring us a referral any sooner than a March 10th LID but the earlier the better with the way things are going these days.
The buzz of interest at the moment is that it appears all the June, July and August dossiers are out of the "review room" in China. This means the only thing left for those people is for their dossier to sit in a pile in the "matching room" and to wait to be matched with their baby. Just because those month's dossiers are in the matching room does not mean that the next batch of referrals will include all those dates but it's a good sign of potential speeding up at the China Center for Adoption Affairs.
Time will tell.
I emailed our agency to to find out if they had heard anything about when our LID (log in date) might have been/will be and the response was that they don't expect to find out what it was for a few weeks to a couple more months.
It's not a big deal really as I have every reason to believe our dossier has been logged in in China or is about to be but it's mainly a curiosity factor as to what that date may be.
I had originally hoped the LID would be late February so our DTC and LID would both be in February but it doesn't matter. Come time for referral, the cut off for the batch of referrals in a given month could just as easily be the 20th of one month or the 10th of the next or any date for that matter. So there's little logic to hoping that having a Feb 28th LID will bring us a referral any sooner than a March 10th LID but the earlier the better with the way things are going these days.
The buzz of interest at the moment is that it appears all the June, July and August dossiers are out of the "review room" in China. This means the only thing left for those people is for their dossier to sit in a pile in the "matching room" and to wait to be matched with their baby. Just because those month's dossiers are in the matching room does not mean that the next batch of referrals will include all those dates but it's a good sign of potential speeding up at the China Center for Adoption Affairs.
Time will tell.
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
Some folks got referrals this week
So the people with LIDs from May 14, 2005 through May 25, 2005 got their referrals yesterday. Well I should say several of those people got theirs. Apparently referrals for at least two agencies are lost in the mail. Supposedly the CCAA uses DHL to send referrals to the agencies then most agencies use fedex to send the packets to the parents. It sounds like DHL has "misplaced" the packets. I haven't read anything more about it today but hopefully the families that are still waiting will hear something soon.
The referral, by the way, contains the baby's picture and varying amounts of medical and other info about the baby/child. People who have recived their baby information this week will hopefully travel to China in 6-10 weeks to be united with their child.
It's pretty discouraging for only 10 days worth of LIDs to be matched this month but there's no way of predicting what will happen next month. For the most part it appears that the CCAA sends referrals only once a month but it has done two batches in a month previously so anything can happen. All I know is that if they continue to match only 10-15 days worth of LIDs per month then we have a loooooong way to go.
Here's a quote I wish I could embrace but I don't think I have the patience of Maya Angelou. I'll try though.
Since time is the one immaterial object which we cannot influence--neither speed up nor slow down, add to nor diminish-- it is an imponderably valuable gift.
--Maya Angelou
The referral, by the way, contains the baby's picture and varying amounts of medical and other info about the baby/child. People who have recived their baby information this week will hopefully travel to China in 6-10 weeks to be united with their child.
It's pretty discouraging for only 10 days worth of LIDs to be matched this month but there's no way of predicting what will happen next month. For the most part it appears that the CCAA sends referrals only once a month but it has done two batches in a month previously so anything can happen. All I know is that if they continue to match only 10-15 days worth of LIDs per month then we have a loooooong way to go.
Here's a quote I wish I could embrace but I don't think I have the patience of Maya Angelou. I'll try though.
Since time is the one immaterial object which we cannot influence--neither speed up nor slow down, add to nor diminish-- it is an imponderably valuable gift.
--Maya Angelou
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